Sleep. A basic, innate human need. An instinct. Most people spend roughly one third of their lives asleep. Unfortunately I’m not one of them. I view sleeping as a skill. I have many skills, some of them are even useful and productive skills. Sleep, however, is not listed on my resume. I do it every night, just not as much as I’d like or as often as most. Sounds like my sex life, but that’s a topic for another post. As I said, to me sleep is such a difficult enterprise that I view it as a skill. I’m good at falling asleep. I’m just not good at staying there. Today I woke up at 4:24 a.m. I’m not sure what that is in metric time for my Canadian and European friends, but in America that’s damn early. If I lived on a farm the roosters would be telling me to go back to bed. There are historical anecdotal reports that Leonardo DaVinci got by on catnaps throughout the day. If poor sleep begets artistic genius I ought to have a few masterpieces done by now. I suppose my masterpiece is, I’m sure you’ll agree, this blog. Yep, I’m the Leonardo DaVinci of blogs. Hmmm….I may have an idea for a new blog title…See?!!? Without enough sleep I just ramble idiotically. Is idiotically even a word? Maybe that’s my sleep deprived genius at work. I’m creating new words like Leonardo created paintings. Like I said, I get to sleep easily and I get 6-7 hours straight, but then my brain just turns on. Unfortunately when my brain turns on it’s asking me what I’m going to do at work today or what bills I need to pay instead of ideas for great paintings and sculptures. I’m sure you’re also thinking, “Phil’s lack of sleep sure as hell isn’t giving him and great blog ideas either.” Anybody else out there in the same boat as me with your sleep? Does anyone else have non-pharmaceutical ideas for extending my sleep past 6-7 hours?
Self-proclaimed grand poobah of leisure and author of humorous suspense novels The Sneaker Tree & White Picket Prisons, the humor essay book Fifty Shades of Phil and the long running blog The Phil Factor. thephilfactor.com
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