The 51st Most Beautiful Person

People Magazine released their 50 Most Beautiful People edition this week. Spoiler Alert! I wasn’t on the list again. Hard to believe right? Trust me, I’m as outraged about it as you are.

people

Rumor has it I was 51, but that doesn’t even get you honorable mention in the magazine. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not arguing with any of their choices because I don’t know who they are. Apparently you have to buy the magazine. C’mon People, have you got some sort of vendetta against me? First I lose out on Sexiest Man Alive. Ok, I guess I can see that since you only choose one, this might not have been my year. Neither me nor James Van der Beek won Sexiest Man Alive this past Fall, so I don’t feel so bad. If it’s not me, I don’t know how that guy doesn’t win every year. I’m not gay but if I was it would be for James Van der Beek.

Seriously People Magazine, when you open the list up to FIFTY I don’t see how I don’t at least squeak in there at 47 or something like that. Just like Pink below, who made the list, I had my naked pictures all ready to send in.

pink-660

Ok, okay, stop asking, I’ll post my picture already!

Arnold

Sadly this wasn’t enough. Always a bridesmaid, never a bride is the story of my life going all the way back to my second place finish in the Pinewood Derby in Cub Scouts, my alternate status for the county spelling bee, and that internship at the White House in the late 90’s I just missed out on.

Bill & Phil

I was on stand by for the last shuttle mission. Apparently when ranking the crew for missions, sarcastic writer guy comes just after pilot, navigator, and engineer. Something about payload and fuel got me bumped from that flight. Well, that and the fact that I became incontinent during the practice launch.

As always, if you enjoy #ThePhilFactor I’d love it if you’d try one of my books or at least share this by hitting the Facebook, Twitter or reblog buttons below. Have a great weekend! ~Phil

 

11 responses to “The 51st Most Beautiful Person

  1. I can’t believe that they’ve missed you off again Phil! It only seems like 5 minutes since I read you last post about their poor choices last year! How time flies! Here’s hoping for next year!

  2. I’m outraged at this oversight!!! In order to show People how I feel, I will continue my habit of actively not reading their magazine. 😉

  3. This is insane! Look at those pictures. Clearly your versatility to look stunning as both a man and a woman is the very definition of beauty. I have a good mind to write the People people a strongly worded email!

  4. Lol, I am feeling slight more disturbed that usual after viewing those pictures.. *snorks*
    Couldn’t resist a visit when I saw the Tagline ‘Where Sarcasm Gets Drunk & Lets Its Hair Down..’ lol
    Great Post 🙂
    ML
    x

  5. I really like your attitude…………… its a great post!

  6. Your hair looks great in the Clinton pic.

Leave a Reply