A Conversation with My Future Grandchildren


The genesis for this post occurred when I was eating at a diner recently. Nearby was a table of ten elderly folks, all looking about 70 if i had to guess. Maybe they were high school friends who still get together weekly. I wasn’t paying them much attention other than the fleeting thought that I wouldn’t want to be the waitress cashing them out when they’re all trying to pay for their meals individually, with exact change and coupons from other restaurants. Suddenly, very clearly, I heard one sentence of their conversation uttered by one of the women. She said, “We grew up without frosting.”



Really? That’s her tale of woe? No frosting was the biggest hardship when she grew up in the old days? I remember my grandparents, who were born in the early 1900’s telling tales of The Great Depression and World War II. My parents told stories of growing up without television and gathering around the radio at night to listen to their family’s favorite shows. Then it occurred to me that someday I’ll be passing on my own tales of “the good old days” to my grandchildren.

Picture a beautiful brick fireplace filled with the warm glow of holgraphic  fire. Imagine elderly Phil wearing a cardigan and sitting in a large, red velvet covered chair with a young child on each knee.



Xena: “Grampa Phil, what was it like when you were young?”

Me: “What do you mean when I was young? Are you saying I’m not? I’m just kidding you little whippersnapper! When I was young, old people said things like whippersnapper, and we didn’t have wi-fi!

Kylo Ren: No wi-fi? But how did you connect to the internet?

Me: There was no such thing as the internet when I was your age. In fact, we had to learn how to do math in our heads, or by writing on paper.

Xena: What’s math?

Me: Oh, never mind. That’s just a thing with numbers. Speaking of numbers, when I was a your age we used real numbers alot, like when we dialed a telephone.


Kylo Ren: Wow! You dialed a real telephone? Was it hard? What does “dial” mean? 

Me: (ignoring last question) And our telephones were connected to the wall by a cord! We could only walk about six feet with our phones.

Xena: Why? Did they think you were going to steal them? Were you in prison?

Me: No, (chuckling) I wasn’t in prison and President Bieber was just a singer back then too. Not a good one, but…ok, there’s no buts. He just wasn’t a very good singer. He’s a much better President.

Sorry folks. I’ve got nothing else today. I just wasn’t feeling the funny this morning. Have a great weekend! ~Phil


36 responses to “A Conversation with My Future Grandchildren

  1. Ha HA! I enjoyed that Phil, not sure about President Bieber though!

  2. I miss telephones attached to the wall. Ours looked just like the one above except it was harvest gold. Snazzy. There was something wonderful about knowing you had a 6′ circle [7′ if you stretched the cord and leaned out] in which to talk. It limited you, but made the conversations so much more on point and short… which to me, an introvert, was [and still is] a good thing.

    • Once about 15 years ago I was working in a school. Among the toys available for recess was a toy dial phone. I remember a young kid asking me how it worked. I thought that was so funny.

  3. Cracked me up, methinks you should expand it into a longer story. Nice touch with Prez Bieber, too.

  4. Hey, I think Bieber is Canadian so some laws might have to change for him to be president. And now I’m embarrassed that I know even that much about him. Ugh! Anyway, hilarious!

  5. When you are older with grans on your knees
    who know not of records much less DVDs
    You can tell them how it was and how you survived
    And that year you were voted Sexiest Man Alive.

  6. Hey that’s ok you can keep him!

  7. Actually Bieber is quite a good singer. And his latest album has got great reviews. Sorry to upset you like this. πŸ˜‰

  8. Phil, although not in the mood, you managed not only to write a post, but to make it interesting and funny: “Did they think you were going to steal them?”

    I’m sorry for the reason you’re not shouting joy from the rooftops today. My hug from a distance.
    (doesn’t look like much, does it?)

  9. Elderly at 70? You must have misjudged.those folk’s age. Baby boomers will challenge you to an iron person competition if you call them elderly. I’m just sayin’

    • I know a 70 year old guy who I’m sure could beat me at an iron man competition but he’s still 70 and if I’m lucky, I’ll live long enough to be considered that elderly.

  10. First when I read “What’s math?” it made me wish I was born in that era, but then I read “President Beiber” and it all came crashing down πŸ˜› Nope, I’m happy with the time I was born in πŸ˜€

  11. Bieber…a much better President. Ha!
    And you say you weren’t feeling funny!

    • Thanks. I just didn’t feel that I had either the quantity or consistent quality of humor that I’m used to putting out there. Glad you liked the Bieber joke.

  12. Thanks for bringing fun into the world. And thanks for dropping by my blog. Best in 2016!

  13. Pingback: Free-for-all Friday | Edwina's Episodes

  14. This was written when you weren’t feeling funny? That’s a pretty high bar. I’m hooked enough to give a follow.:-)

  15. Very tongue-in-cheek post but seems like a message is inside too- old age will come to the best of us, if we live that long.

  16. “Were you in prison?” LOL πŸ˜›

  17. This was funny… lol and the change yes ive had to stand in line while they empty their coin bag in front of the cashier then the wait begins…. because they also have to examine each coin to make sure it’s a penny or qtr haha…

  18. Losing the Plot

    I refer to my university days as circa 10BG, (before Google) tried explaining how it worked to our current interns, they just looked blank! Lol!

  19. You say you’re not feeling funny, but you still made me laugh with President Bieber. Well laugh & also feel slightly terrified.

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