Being John Malkovich the Thief

imdb.com This is NOT me.

imdb.com This is NOT me.

Yes, I’m calling out John Malkovich for stealing ideas from my blog. What a jerk. In a post I wrote two years ago I outlined how I’ve written and scheduled Facebook, Twitter, and blog posts to last until well after I’ve passed. (Don’t worry. I’m never really going to die. I’ve got that covered. Or I may be dead already. This could be one of those pre-scheduled posts) Now John Malkovich is essentially doing the same thing, but with a movie.

Earlier this week John Malkovich (Being John Malkovich, Zoolander 2) , who is a great actor, made a movie with director Robert Rodriguez (Spy Kids) called “100 Years—The Movie You Will Never See.” Allegedly, they made the movie and then as soon as they were done, they put it in a vault with instructions for it to be released on November 18th, 2115. Here’s the preview:

Also apparently 1000 invitations to the premiere of the movie in 2115 were given out to a select group of people to hand down to their children or grandchildren. To be perfectly honest, if I was one of those future people who gets a movie ticket as their inheritance, I would be kind of pissed. Seriously, what are the chances that a movie made now will seem any good in 100 years. The special effects will be outdated and cheesy and the future people will wonder why the past people carried those ridiculous cell phones with them. Still, if one of those tickets ends up on E-bay, I’m buying it.

So what do you think? Is the movie a cool idea or pretentious ego-centric crap? Here’s what I’ve done to get back at John Malkovich for stealing from my blog: I’ve written and scheduled a blog post for 6:00 a.m. the day before his future movie’s release in 2115, and in the post I give away the whole plot of the movie. What? You want to know how I could possibly know the plot of a movie that no one has seen? Have you already forgotten that I’m psychic? Because I’m psychic, I knew you’d forget. That’s why I just reminded you. Also, because of my psychicness, I know all I need to know about the movie and I’m going to spill the beans a day early. Mr. Malkovich, your move.

So in the court of public opinion, who wins, me or John Malkovich?

Have a great Saturday! ~Phil

15 responses to “Being John Malkovich the Thief

  1. Don’t you just hate it when people steal your ideas?….but then you knew I was going to ask you that didn’t you…hehe

  2. Of course you win I say no way
    That movie sees the light of day.

  3. Hm. I think it’s a lame idea, perhaps unrelatable for future audiences, but then, we still watch the earliest films…
    I don’t like anything artistic that caters to the elite.
    I like John Malkovich’s voice, but otherwise, Phil, you win!

  4. Really?! I’m left just scratching my head.

    So, supposedly millions have been spent on a movie that deliberately will have no payback? … and why create a trailer for today’s audience?

    Yeah, I’m still scratching me head. This premise doesn’t make sense.

  5. You know I think you and John are brothers. Put some hair, a beard, and a moustache on his picture. What do you have? Phil Malkovitch or John Taylor. Your idea is in his DNA. He couldn’t help himself.

  6. I heard him talking about this on The Graham Norton Show just recently. Quite a spooky idea, I thought. But, I prefer your idea of scheduling posts everywhere for years to come. That’ll put the wind up the great, great, great, great (how many greats?) grandkids. One of them should say, ‘I’m watching you, you know.’

  7. How will they even play it in the future? I mean, won’t it need to be on a format that essentially plays directly into the cerebrum and initiates a memory so you don’t need to bother with actually wasting an hour of your life in front of a screen? I bet WordPress hasn’t sorted out its glitches by then though… 😉

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