Carol Brady, Fidel Castro, and Me

Like two sides of a coin, good and evil, Florence Henderson, aka Carol Brady, and Fidel Castro, former Dictator of Cuba, both died yesterday. For those of you that haven’t had your morning coffee, Florence Henderson represented the good, All-American mom on the iconic 1970’s show The Brady Bunch. Fidel Castro was the Communist dictator who, with several of his supporters, including his brother Raul, now President, overthrew the Cuban government in 1959.

Good and evil, Yin and Yang, give and take, ebb and flow, Kanye and Bieber, the simultaneous passing of two icons who represented opposite ideals in the old world has a fitting kind of balance doesn’t it? There’s something that troubles me about this though. A disturbance in the  Force if you will.

First, they always say that celebrity deaths happen in threes. That means that there’s one more sad, Earth shaking celebrity death to come. Who is it? What if it’s someone we like? What if it’s Justin Bieber? Or a Kardashian? Or Neil DeGrasse Tyson? Another death of that magnitude would rock the world’s pop culture to it’s core. Or worse yet, what if it’s (gasp) ME? (You are taken aback for a moment, thinking that I’m obviously delusional about the popularity of my blog and books) YOU? you think, or maybe even say aloud as you involuntarily spit out your coffee. (I of course am hoping that I’m worth a spit take)

Yes, there are reasons why I might be the perfect third celebrity death. Well, maybe not perfect from my point of view. Sure, my celebrity status may be questionable at best, but I may be the one person on the planet who can be connected to both Florence Henderson and Fidel Castro. Yes, that’s right. If this were a crime, the police would interview me as a person of interest first. Intrigued? I would be. Here is how I’m connected to both these people:

Fidel Castro: My mother talked to his brother, current Cuban President Raul, on the phone once. That was back in the days before Tinder when people actually used telephones to talk. I’m pretty sure she swiped left. No, seriously, my mom did talk to Raul Castro once. In 1959 she was the secretary to a president of a company that had people working in Cuba when the Castro rebellion occurred. The companies workers in Cuba were taken hostage. Raul Castro called to speak to the company President to negotiate their release. My mom took the call. Had she swiped right and been flirty with the sexy Latin rebel, maybe Raul falls for her, abandons the rebellion and it collapses without him, he defects to the States to meet her and I’d have grown up with Daddy Raul in the Miami burbs and a democratic Cuba 90 miles to the south. The 1963 Cuban Missle Crisis would have been averted. It’s the little things in life that make a difference. Never underestimate your impact.

Florence Henderson: Last year I interviewed Brady Bunch cast member Robbie Rist for this blog.

So there you have it. If someone else famous is going to die, it’s going to be me. While I’m not thrilled by the implications, I’m tempted to fake my own death just so I’ll go down in history remembered with Carol Brady and Fidel Castro. That’s an eclectic threesome isn’t it? And if this were my last blog post ever, imagine how viral this would go?

It could also go viral if you hit the Facebook or Twitter share button below just because you want to make my day. Maybe my last day. Who knows? Have a great weekend! ~Phil