5 Reasons You Should NOT Follow SickChristine

DO NOT FOLLOW THIS WOMAN

Apparently Sick Christine of I’m Sick and So Are You is pulling some stunt where she’s telling people not to follow my blog. I believe that’s she’s jealous of my identity as the King of Sarcasm. She seem’s to think that she’s more sarcastic and funnier than I am. Today she’s actually listing reasons on her blog why people shouldn’t follow me. That’s right, me! Can you imagine anyone not wanting to follow me? Yeah, me neither. But Christine? I can think of a whole host of reasons why you shouldn’t follow her! In fact, just so she doesn’t think that she can get away with one upping me by trying to drive readers away from my blog, I’m going to list all the reasons you shouldn’t follow her second best sarcasm blog:

5. She Has No Concept of Weather and Season’s: She’s one of those people who grew up somewhere warm and sunny and moved to a place that is only slightly less warm and sunny. She’ll get no sympathy from me, but if you want to hear her whine about how tough her Fall was, go read THISWhatever you do though, DO NOT tell her I sent you. She’d just love to know that she’s stealing MY blog traffic.

4. She Likes Coffee WAY too much: Either that or she has a crush on Juan Valdez, or his donkey. It’s no wonder she writes so much. She’s freebasing coffee all day every day, at least as far as I can tell. That much caffeine can’t be good for the brain, which probably explains her sarcasm and epic rants about needing Skittles. She even Instagrams pictures of her coffee!

3. Sick Christine says Mean Things About Her Cat: Seriously? The most gentle and affectionate creatures in the world and she claims hers is psychotic and out to get her. I’d like to see her cats blog about Christine. Now that would be great reading!

2. She Uses The “F word”: Ugh. Blatant sensationalism. Am I right? She just goes around saying things she thinks exactly how she thinks them. Seriously, who does that? All my blog posts are lies. I never tell you what I’m feeling or thinking. Christine? She’s full of thoughts and feelings and she just says them. If you want to avoid thought and feeling provoking topics, do not go anywhere near Christine’s blog.

1. She was “Discovered”: WordPress features great posts that they think everybody should read. Yeah, she got it just 6 months after she started her blog. 6 months! I’ve been blogging for almost 13 years and not once have I been Freshly Pressed or Discovered, and that’s just how I like itBeing recognized by the man and fawned over is not at all the sign of a ground breaking sarcastic artiste is it? Apparently writing a smart, funny post full of painfully raw emotion is considered “good.” Whatever. If you hate that kind of stuff like I do, just make sure that you don’t read her post I Need To Tell You

Like I said, if you are tempted to go see what a train wreck her blog is, 1. You will be dead to me, and 2. Don’t tell her I sent you. If anyone else wants to be featured on The Phil Factor or write a guest post, feel free to let me know in the comments or by e-mail. Have a great Friday! ~Phil

40 responses to “5 Reasons You Should NOT Follow SickChristine

  1. This is brilliant love it Phil!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I agree. She’s shit and can’t write to save her life. Everyone should avoid her blog like the plague. Good call Phil.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. I’ve left a burning comment for I’m Sick. You are psychic, everyone knows that.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Discovered after 6 months! I’ll be back to finish this comment after I go throw up. Oh, does that mean I’m sick like Christine?

    Liked by 2 people

  5. Never heard of her. I think I’ll pass on checking her blog out 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Your argument is pretty persuasive, Phil…..and that blog from her cats would make a fantastic read! Don’t worry if I go anywhere near her posts I won’t let on you sent me….your secret is safe.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. I’d also like a blog from the cat. We’d get the truth then.

    Liked by 4 people

  8. Well, well, well. Now that I know what you really think of me I don’t feel the teensiest bit of remorse for bringing down your whole blog. P.S. Thank you.

    Liked by 3 people

  9. I’m going to follow her so I can immediately UNfollow her! See how she copes with that!
    P.S. I’m so glad that your Follow Me button is bigger than hers!

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Right. I will never ever go visit her blog… no matter how much my curiosity bothers me. 🤨

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Coffee drinkers who are fond of the F-bomb are not my people.

    Liked by 2 people

  12. Haha, Phil, you are so funny. I don’t know Christine so you are quite safe from a desertion by me.

    Like

  13. Don’t know her, don’t care to. I have the awesome Phil Factor for all my sarcastic needs. 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  14. Um – can we start a petition to see her cat’s blog? I mean I am a dog person and all, so I would imagine the cat wouldn’t have very much to say other than how smug and superior it is (even though recent evidence suggests that dogs are far more intelligent), but I have a feeling a detailed account of all its foiled attempts would be amusing.

    Like

  15. You two are hysterical!!!! Living proof that reverse psychology works!!!! Lol Now I’m going to have to follow you too to insure my daily “belly laugh fix”!

    Liked by 1 person

  16. This was a nice promo for Sick Christine. Well done, Phil. I see she did thank you.

    Liked by 1 person

  17. That coffee and skittles thing is a definite head scratcher. I mean, can a good writer like coffee? I think not. Only plain water for writers. Oh wait, that’s not writers that’s horses. My bad. Christine does speak her mind–a thing I both love and fear. You two on my list of awesome. So I suppose I’ll just have to keep reading despite your obvious flaws.

    Liked by 1 person

  18. You’ve made such a great case against her, Phil, that I’m going to unfollow her right now!

    Liked by 1 person

  19. I have a feeling sick Christine
    Isn’t really quite that mean.

    Like

  20. Nicely done, Phil!
    I will never be freshly pressed or discovered because I’m R rated and sometimes talk about sex. 🙄

    Liked by 1 person

  21. She’s full of thoughts and feelings and just says them? Aren’t We the People in enough trouble already because we have that guy? I prefer your visionary humor.

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

w

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.