Top Ten Tuesday! Ten Things I Will Never Intentionally Eat

Are you wondering how the title goes with that picture of a guinea pig? Read on! If I were to go on a reality show like Survivor or Fear Factor (the show that helped me come up with the name The Phil Factor) I’d be fine with eating bugs and snakes. This may be tempting fate, but here are ten things I will never eat intentionally.

10. Mustard: I believe that this is a substance spawned in the bowels of hell. I put only ketchup on my hot dogs. I can throw up right now if I just think about mustard long enough. Moving on…

9. Onions: I’d rather eat broken glass. I can tolerate some onion powder in a dish, I’m OK with the flavor, but not the texture of onions in my mouth.

8. Other humans: Like I said, I may be tempting fate here, but cannibalism just seems to be in bad taste. Of course if my plane goes down in the Andes mountains and we run out of peanuts…

7. Brains: Not human of course. In many countries it’s not unusual to eat animal brains. The brain reportedly is the most nutritionally dense part of any animal. It just seems wrong. What if in some comic book type plot I suddenly starting thinking like and talking like the animal whose brain I ate? I’d probably fail as a zombie.

6. Seahorses: They’re served fried on a stick in China. I think they’re cute and have a look of intelligence.

seahorses

5. Guinea pig: Often eaten in South American countries. Umm…no thanks. I find them ugly and repulsive when they’re alive. Did you know that if you pick them up by their tail their eyes will pop out?

4. Kiviak: This one makes we want to puke just thinking about it. Kiviak is a traditional Inuit (Eskimo) food from Greenland. They take a seal, dead I hope, and stuff it with 500 birds, also dead I hope, and then bury it under the ground to ferment for months. It is said to help the Inuits combat vitamin deficiencies in their diet. Haven’t the Inuits ever heard of taking actual vitamins? Someone get them a wi-fi signal! (I was going to put a picture in for this one, but all the pictures of it were very off putting in the morning.

3. Deviled eggs: I eat hard boiled eggs, scrambled eggs, fried eggs and most any other kind of eggs. Won’t touch a deviled egg. It just looks wrong. Ugh, and adding the paprika on top makes it look wronger.

2. Smalahove: It’s sheeps head. They eat it in Norway. I’ll eat just about any animal, but at least take the face off first.

sheeps

1. Pickles: Of all the things on this list this is the one I would choose last if forced to. If I’m on a reality show and the challenge is to eat a pickle with mustard I bow out immediately no matter how much money is on the line. It’s the sour, awful vinegar. I can’t get past the smell. I held a pickle once but couldn’t bring myself to eat it.

So what foods are your kryptonite and why?

Have a great Tuesday! ~Phil

76 responses to “Top Ten Tuesday! Ten Things I Will Never Intentionally Eat

  1. I’m with you all of the above except for mustard, onions and pickles. Love them and all together in a sandwich would be divine. Mmm….I have a craving for that now!

  2. Gotta agree with you on a few of those! I can’t do mustard either, and any of those obscure ones…! Eurgh!
    I will NEVER be forced to eat Karela either, or bittergourd… no matter how good my mother in law tells me it is for me!

  3. P.S… did you see the review? 😉

  4. Marmite. Do you know this faecal paste Phil? It makes pickled eggs… Yep they’re a thing over here.. taste divine

  5. So your okay with tongue and tripe? You sound a lot like my daughter. How do you feel about hourseradish?

  6. Not good on pickled onions I suppose as that blends two all in one! Most of the rest I didn’t need to read. Boxed up in my subconscious never to be opened #thanks!

    Chutney I don’t do either, or that stuff TanGental mentioned, mind you my local supermarket cafe finds me eating nothing at all…ever….even good foods are bad there!

    Oh, tripe too….definitely not!

    Or a can of worms either….since this is what this post appears to have opened…fish bait up yes, but me..no… except on one level maybe I do as I eat the fish that has eaten the worm…although that’s another post concept 😂

    • LOL! That’s what I like about this post; it opens a can of worms, sometimes literally, for everyone to comment on!

      • Huge area for expansion and spam…never quite got the hang of that though either, although carp love it. And peperami for that matter…I digress.

        Of course there’s mileage in chips too. High temperatures tend to burn oils which break down into aldehydes which are carcinogens…just saying….never use olive oil in a wok either…even worse. That rules out loads of cooked food in one sweep 😂😂

      • Are you saying I have to give up chips?

      • Good lord no, air fryers work really well and the best oil is coconut oil. Hardly any aldehydes in that one when it gets hot. Obviously this one is do as I say, not as I do…pass the ketchup good man.

  7. Well, I have eaten chocolate covered ants, dulce, raw shark and dried moose, so I’ll try anything once.

  8. You would not find German cuisine to your taste, that is for sure. It’s all about mustard, onions and often pickles. I do not eat any pork or red meat. Pretty much OK with most veggies though, and I love pickles!

  9. Two things. Yellow squash and okra. My gag reflex kicks in on yellow squash. The slime on okra causes me to leave the room quickly.

  10. I can’t speak on all of those exotic delicacies you wrote about, but I promised when I left my parents house I would never again eat lima or baked beans. Or eggplant, cream chipped beef on anything, the list is endless.
    Try mixing some horseradish in with your mashed potatoes. Cuts down on the harshness of the horseradish and gives that boring dish of potatoes a little zing.

    • I appreciate your advice regarding the horseradish and potatoes, but I will have to politely decline. I will never intentionally eat horseradish. You can have my share of it for the rest of our lives

  11. I don’t know which is worst – the bird stuffed seal, the fried seahorses on a stick or eating really cute Guinnea Pigs! 😱 Personally I can’t eat or even look at Tripe or any Offal for that matter, Hard boiled eggs are pretty nasty and Pickled eggs are even worse! All other eggs are ok 🙂 – (I love the word Wronger! 😂)

  12. Funny, Phil. Yeah, for me, the things I hate most are the meats and meat by-products/offal, like bugs and guinea pigs, beef tongue (brain, etc.). I’ve never eaten veal, for my own moral reasons. I don’t eat goat or sheep/lamb or deer, if I can help it (was tricked into trying deer long ago). I have actually tried octopus, though; not as bad as I thought it would be, but it’s rubbery. However, I’ve decided not to eat it anymore, because octopus are quite intelligent creatures and that just feels worse to me. But mustard is good; I never realized how good it was, cause I’d nurtured a hatred of it since childhood, not realizing what I really hated was all those rice-sized onions. Why on earth would anyone make onions rice-sized, then smear them in ketchup and mustard so you can never get the dang things off a bun because they’re suctioned on there!?! So, I’m sorta with you on the onion thing, Phil.

  13. I will never be able to cook you dinner Phil. I’m always serving up Kiviak and I put onions in everything (one of those statements is true).

  14. Some foods are gross
    That is true
    I promise never
    To eat glue.

  15. The Not Fake DC

    I feel like your onion aversion is backwards. I get if someone doesn’t like the taste of onion, but what’s wrong with the texture. They’re realively snappy and crisp.

  16. Liver – just the thought of it, never mind the smell, makes me ill.

    Chick peas and Lima beans – taste like dirt. I think this is a texture thing.

    Eel – shocking, huh?

    I’m with you on the brains & sheep head, but no mustard? Come on, Phil!! 😂

  17. I put only mustard in my hot dog and not ketchup! Opposite of you! The Inuit fermented food??!! Yuk!!! Never!!! I like onions. I don’t think I would eat liver. I’ve never tried it but it sure seems disgusting. I’ve had beef heart fajitas and while they were not the best, if I had to eat that to survive for a while, I guess I wouldn’t die.

  18. I don’t have a food like that. I pretty much eat anything. There are foods I don’t like very much and they’re foods people love, like nutella, meatloaf, pork chops… And some others that not many people love, like cooked beets, sauerkraut, and gefilte fish. Still, I’ll try anything, just may not want it a second time.

  19. Who doesn’t like pickles? Who are you? Aside from that seal/bird/fermented thing I’d pretty much eat anything, with the exception of liver. I’m not a fan. But seriously, pickles?

  20. I’ll eat half of what’s on your list.

  21. 60 comments! Do you even care now what I have to say? Gotta go with you on that Kiviak thing. Birds in a pie is one thing but leave those seals alone.
    I like deviled eggs, I have a special recipe. Mustard, no, I wouldn’t barf but I gave that up for lent and never went back. A Hamster, ahhhh! No!!!

  22. I was sure, for most of my life, that I hated mustard and felt perfectly justified in this opinion. It was vile, after all, and the color was not a food color and do you know what you get when you heat up mustard seeds? TOXIC GAS.

    Then I tried brown mustard.

    Turns out it’s not mustard I don’t like: it’s that vile yellow stuff they put everywhere in the US. It’s mostly vinegar and the third worst thing I’ve put in my mouth, ever.

  23. I am with you on all of these except pickles and mustard. I don’t particularly chose them but I don’t have strong objections to them. I would add caviar and frogs legs to your list, oh, and snails.

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  25. During one of my many pregnancies, I craved yellow mustard. I know. Sick. At least I didn’t crave it on a seahorse kabob or a sheep head sandwich. I’m not totally depraved. Did you ever read that book, “The Road” about a post apocalyptic America where food is scarce and gangs roam the land with their pregnant women/food stores?

  26. Oh man I love me some fried goat brains with caramalized onions and some spicy mustard! Pickes gross me out tho…

  27. Oh! And I can’t raisins. Hate it when they manage to look like chocolate chips in cookies and stuff.

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