Top Ten Tuesday! The Top Ten Best Captains

If Sgt. Pepper had been promoted, this would have been an easier list. At the end please tell me your favorite or who you would add that I missed.

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10. Captain Jack Sparrow is the only captain on this list wearing eye liner.

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9. Captain Underpants: See? Not all captains are pirates or in the military! If you’re not familiar, Captain Underpants is a series of graphic novels, sort of, aimed at the 8-12 year old boys demographic, much like my blog.

Worst picture I've ever put on #ThePhilFactor

Worst picture I’ve ever put on #ThePhilFactor

8. Captain & Tennille: A cheesy husband/wife musical duo from the 70’s. The Captains “real” name is Daryl Dragon. He and Tennille used to wife swap with Tony Orlando and Dawn.

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7. Captain Morgan: Aaaand we’re back to the pirate theme. After this famous Englihman got done plundering Puerto Rico they named a rum after him.

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6. Captain America: This virtuous warrior always beats Captain England in a fight.

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5. Captain Hook:  That hook for a hand had to crimp his style with the ladies, but on the bright side he always had a corkscrew with him.

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4. Captain and Coke: If you sneak a flask of rum into the movies in your purse or under your coat, you can buy a large coke at concessions and you’re good to go for the next two hours. It makes any movie funnier.

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3. Captain Kangaroo was the main character on a terrible children’s show when I was a kid. Ironically, the show never featured an actual kangaroo, so I’m not sure who he was Captain over.

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2. Captain Kirk: He was a bad ass before the phrase bad ass was invented.

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1. Cap’n Crunch: I’d never disrespect the inventor of crunchberries by calling him “Captain” instead of Cap’n. Pretty sure he’d shiv me with a sharpened spoon and then use it to eat his breakfast over my cold, dead body. How’s that for a bad ass Captain?

Those are the ten best captains I could think of. Did I miss any of your favorites?

Have a great Tuesday! ~Captain Phil

30 responses to “Top Ten Tuesday! The Top Ten Best Captains

  1. Captain Scarlet and the Mysterons – watched the re-runs of this kids show with my dad. He watched it when he was a kid!

  2. Losing the Plot

    Captain Pugwash forever! You might also consider Captain Birdseye for all the fish finger lovers.

    Google them

  3. I’m partial to Captain Underpants. My boys have every book… And we’ve seen the movie, too. 😆

  4. Captain America! I’m a huge Marvel nerd.

    • I love all the Marvel movies too. I just saw Deadpool two last night. If you haven’t seen it yet, you should. It’s as good as the first one. And we have Ant-man and the wasp coming up soon!

      • Saw it Saturday – definitely just as good, if not better. So many references, I need to see it at least twice more to catch them all.

  5. Phil,

    Never, ever put a picture of The Captain and Tennille on your blog again.

    Okay?

    Signed, a loyal fan.

  6. Captain America is my favorite!

    I do like Captain Jack Harkness, too.

  7. PUGWASH!

  8. You did a great job. I can’t think of another except Captain Stoobing from the Love Boat.

  9. Any captain list omitting Captain Caveman is inherently flawed.

  10. I was going to be very disappointed if the legendary Captain Horatio Magellan Crunch and his delicious crunchberries did not make the list at #1. Thank you for your service.

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