It’s the end of the world as we know it, and I feel fine… R.E.M. 1987 Why Michael Stipe said that I don’t know. Hopefully he reads my blog and will explain in the comments section below. I don’t feel fine. If the world ends that would kind of suck. I’m having fun. If the Mayans were right, enjoy my blog while you can. By the time I get around to Part III it might be too late. But, if the world’s going to end we might as well have some fun with it. Sure we can all speculate about or last words to loved ones, running up the credit cards and eating cheesecake all month, blah, blah, blah… let’s get creative! Here are some ways I’ll be preparing for the apocalypse:
1. Send an e-mail to my boss that says, “I quit!” Then five minutes later send another that says “Sorry, that was for my wife.” Then send an e-mail to wife saying, “I quit!” then five minutes later… It’s the end of the world, why not screw with people? How long can they possibly hold a grudge?
2. Pajama jeans. Admit it, we all see those commercials and we mock, but secretly we think to ourselves, “That does look comfortable…” Until the end of the world I am going to rock the pajama jeans to work. Every day. With a shirt and tie. I wonder if they make them in stonewashed?
3. Apply for lots of impressive jobs that begin after Dec. 21. You can lie on your resume and in interviews. It won’t matter! If the world doesn’t end, I am going to have a kick ass resume next year.
4. Exclamation points!!! Every sentence that I type or speak until Dec. 21st will end in an exclamation point! If we have limited time left I want everything to be as exciting as possible! Or at least to seem as exciting as possible! I will speak every sentence up tempo and slightly louder than it should be spoken! If you’re having an End of The World party this should be the one rule you have!
5. Buy the Hostess company! I’ll put in a tremendous bid to buy the entire company out of bankruptcy! If the world ends I won’t have to pay it off and I’ll spend the next two weeks as a national hero! I’ll be known as The Man Who Saved the Twinkies!
This is my summary paragraph! You know the 6 degrees of separation theory?!!? By that theory every person on Earth is separated from anyone else by no more that 6 people connections! Let’s test that theory with hopefully a really fun result! In the first paragraph I speculated as to why Michael Stipe was fine with the end of the world! If we really are only separated by 6 people connections and if every person that reads this goes back to their Facebook page and hits the “Share” button eventually this will get shared where Michael Stipe will see it and leave the requested comment! Don’t just click the Like button below, go back to the post on your FB page and click the Share! We only have two weeks for this to get back to Michael Stipe! Go!