You’re all very lucky I haven’t included a picture with this post. As I stated in Female Bodies Part 1 (June 11 if you want to troll the archives), I work in an office that is usually mostly women. Some days I’m the only guy there. While that is generally a good thing, I sometimes learn things about my co-workers I’d rather not know. The discussion I walked in on today wasn’t anything new to me, but it got me to thinking. Apparently, just before I walked into the room, the ladies in the office were discussing their ahem,..menstrual cycles. As I’ve said before, and this bears repeating, just because the word menstrual has the word men right in it, that does not mean we caused your periods, so don’t take them out on us. Especially at work. Today the ladies were discussing how when one or more women spend a lot of time together, such as in a college sorority house, or an office their cycles get in sync. Just how exactly does that happen? Are your uteruses (or is it uteri?) emitting some kind of radio signal to each other? If they are broadcasting some kind of signal, then what the hell is it doing to me since I have to spend all day walking back and forth through these signals? Is it like standing too close to a microwave, or using my cell phone too much? Will I get some kind of tumor from all this high frequency exposure? Imagine the blast of radiation a gynecologist must get at work. Imagine the week they all have PMS each month! I’m taking vacation that week every month for the rest of the year.
Self-proclaimed grand poobah of leisure and author of humorous suspense novels The Sneaker Tree & White Picket Prisons, the humor essay book Fifty Shades of Phil and the long running blog The Phil Factor. thephilfactor.com
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The reason why women’s menstural cycles become in-sync is due to pheromones. Pheromones are chemicals that are secreted by, I think, most animals. And only animals of the same species can sence pheromones. Men also secret pheromones which is why a woman’s menstrual cycle changes around men as well. It is also the reason why we have attraction to people and some speculate that it is the reason for love at first sight.
Funny post Phil….true and funny!
Thanks for the biology lesson Laura. Have you noticed I’m making jokes here?
It’s not a tumor, it’s not. Phil, when they start bringing private matters into the office, you really need to start talking about some gross guy things. There’s a time and place for everything and these <>ladies<> you work with obviously don’t have a clue. Maybe if jock itch or blue balls became office topic of the day, they might get a clue.
My husband and I caught that show “Mr. Mom” the other night. One of the Dad’s had 5 daughters (plus the wife mind you). This post reminded me of that. That poor dad. Would you want to live in a house with 6 females all menstrating at the same time? Not me.
Y’know i noticed that my son and husband seem to be extremely uptight and not nice during my period. I think my husband is thinking about other women when i’m having my cycles. The only time i get these vibes is when aunt flo is visiting. and another thing he looks at me funny when i’m using (y’know the thingys men can say, can’t buy for you and sure as hell won;t change for you). I think my husband is having his cycles with mine.>>Well that’s what it’s like here in < HREF="http://myrtlebeachtours.com/northmyrtlebeach.htm" REL="nofollow">North Myrtle Beach<>
Poor Phil. It’s a tough life working with all women. You have to put up with the bitchiness and PMS talk but do they at least clue you in on the good stuff like what women like? Pay attention…you can always learn more.
I got a cramp just reading this one.