Save A Tree and A Marriage

As a citizen who is very concerned with the future of global warming, tropical rainforests, and the I.Q. of every man, woman, and child on the planet, I do not believe that famous people should be allowed to date or marry each other. What do celebrity relationships have to do with the environment you ask? Thanks for asking. I’ll tell you. Consider what the public at large has been subjected to over the past 12 months: Tom and Katie, Ben and Jennifer, Brad and Angelina, Nick and Jessica, and of course the other Jennifer’s angst over Brad. If you sing that all really fast you could probably get something like Billy Joel’s “We Didn’t Start The Fire.” See? Even without their last names almost everyone on planet Earth knows who they are and what, or who they’ve been doing. Had all of these celebs elected to date John or Jane Doe’s, probably no less than 6 weekly or monthly magazines would go out of business. People, Us, Star, Celebrity, The Sun, etc.. Without all of these magazines more trees would survive, thus ensuring a healthy and happy planet for our grandchildren. If Nick and Jessica had never laid eyes on each other we’d probably have been able to save a rainforest the size of Greenland. Another point to consider for the celebs to consider before choosing their mate is the abysmal success rate of celebrity marriages. There’s only one celebrity marriage I know of that has stood the test of time without inundating the public periodicals and airwaves with their inane trials and tribulations: Danny Devito and Rhea Perlman. I don’t mind them. They’re cute because they’re little.

13 responses to “Save A Tree and A Marriage

  1. Unfortunately all those same magazines would still follow those same celebrities around simply because they are celebrities. What we have to do is ignore those people and take away their celebrity. Of course the magazines would then create new celebrities that we would have to ignore. Which would create more magazine pages lamenting the lack of celebrities to write about. I’m afraid we can’t win this fight. We will just have to plant more trees. Or pass legislation outlawing frivolous “journalism.”

  2. Danny and Rhea totally rock.

  3. I love Danny, he’s so funny! They really are a great couple 🙂

  4. Thanks for stopping by Bob. It’s nice to meet you.Satuna was my word verification. How cool is that? It sounds like a a special fish you only eat on the weekend.

  5. Well Woman- You changed your name? I hope you’re still well.

  6. Michele- I think Danny’s lucky he found a woman as short as him. He still hasn’t done anything as good as Taxi.

  7. I can’t count how many times I’ve said the exact same thing, but with more of an angry voice.

  8. The amazing thing is that any of them stay together long enough to acually get married. Maybe it’s just something they want on their resume’s

  9. and one more thing:NO MORE ROYAL WEDDINGS OR BIRTHS.

  10. I totally agree, I can’t even read a magazine or watch T.V or come online for that matter with out seeing someone doing something to another someone….Geesh! Give it a rest already! Tawnya

  11. Gyrobo and Gary- Welcome to The Phil Factor.Justine- You’re right about that, but in the states we don’t get too much royal family stuff.

  12. RE: Rhea pearlman and Danny Devito…And becuase no one else wants them….

  13. Princess- You are definitely right about that.

Leave a Reply