Several months ago I asked readers that if they had a choice of powers to be invisible or have the ability to fly, which would you choose? Most people picked invisibility so that they could do sneaky things. On my way to work today I witnessed something that made me think that we all believe we’re invisible sometimes. Based on what I observed today as well as what I’ve seen most mornings during my commute there appears to be a large percentage of the population who believe they are not visible through the windows of their cars.
Last week I followed a man in a pick up truck who was reading the newspaper while he drove. Not just at stop lights, but while the vehicle was in motion. He didn’t have the newspaper folded up small either. He had it wide open on the steering wheel as if he was home having his morning coffee. Fortunately for him, the logo on the side of his truck indicated that he worked for a collision repair shop. It would be redundant to mention all the women doing hair and makeup as they drive, including one I saw using a curling iron. Do they even make car adapter plugs for those? I once read a news story about a man who was arrested for watching t.v. while he drove. He had literally bolted a small television to the dashboard. Sheesh! Even I know that you have to keep the t.v. down on the seat so the cops don’t see you. This guy must have had cable because I didn’t see a satellite dish on the roof of his car.
The worst thing I’ve ever seen was today. I was driving along studying my fellow travelers and doing a little car shopping when I spotted a black Subaru Tribeca (going south on I-390, in case the driver is a blogger, now you know I saw you). “That’s a nice looking car,” I thought to myself. Even if it’s two years until I’m in the market for a new car I’m still always shopping in my mind. In the far left lane I gradually gained on the Subaru. It was sleek, black, and looked very new. Even cars look good in black don’t they? As I pulled alongside, admiring it’s sleek lines, I looked in at the driver. I always look directly in at other drivers just in case it’s some one I might know. The driver was a well-dressed woman, a professional of some type judging by her attire, appearing to be in her mid-50’s. She also seemed to believe that the glass windows of her car made her invisible to others. She was picking her nose. This was not just any nose picking. She was in up to her elbow. She was digging as if in pursuit of an insect that had climbed deep into her sinuses. These weren’t even tinted car windows. This was such a disgusting display that I felt nauseous and immediately hit the accelerator hoping to drive away from the grotesque image now burned into my brain. Needless to say, there is no way I’m ever going to buy a used Subaru Tribeca. I don’t even think I could stomach a new one.