Wanted: Single white female. I’m a charming, handsome man appearing to be in my early twenties. I love nights out on the town with my favorite gal, but also prefer the solitude of somewhere quiet to spend some quality one on one time. Like most men I’m flawed, but I make up for that with my passion and taste for life. I’m a hopeless romantic and I promise that with me you will soar to places you previously thought were impossible. I also might kill you at any moment in a fit of tempestuous rage or passion. I’ve killed all my previous girlfriends, but trust me, you’re special. But please overlook that, nobody’s perfect right?
Would any woman really respond to this ad if it were real? Why are so many women just nuts over Twilight? I’m pretty damn sure that if I had a girlfriend and I found out she was a serial killer that had murdered all of her previous boyfriends that I might find some way to end the relationship: “Really, it’s not you, it’s me. As tempting as it is to risk death every day, I just have too much on my plate right now and a lot of baggage from my previous relationship. It wouldn’t be fair to you. Feel free to look me up on Myspace or Facebook though.” And you can bet your ass I’d send that by text message. You know with a vampire you couldn’t really fake your own death to get out of it because they’d only find that to be a big turn on. I suppose this is just another case where chicks totally dig the bad boy.