This may be the funniest song I’ve ever heard. If you’re so inclined, it’s even funnier to listen to than it is to read. They have two cd’s out and are available on itunes. Here’s their site if you want to read more about them.
The Band: Jesus H. Christ and The Four Hornsmen
The Song: Connecticut’s For Fucking
We live in the dullest state
Package stores all close at eight
Malls are full of optometrists
And restaurants we hate
Swimming across Lake Quassapaug
Stealing makeup, catching frogs
Cutting our feet on broken bottles
As we wade in the Shepaug
It’s true for horses, cows and dogs…
Connecticut’s for fucking
That’s all there is to do.
I love to listen to classic rock
and have sex with you.
Doing hole shots at the mall
Writing Ozzy on a wall
Watch the corn get tall
There’s nothing else to do at all.
Goin’ where we always go
Doin’ what we always do
Waitin’ to turn into the people
We are bound to turn into.
What else do other people do?
Connecticut’s for fucking
It’s the Nutmeg state
If we can’t afford to buy antiques
then we just copulate
Connecticut’s for fucking
And Massachusetts too
I want to climb up the sleepy giant
and have sex with you.
Up in Fairfield
In Old Lyme
We’re just fucking all the time.
Out in Derby
Down in Kent
We’re all busy getting bent
In the Constitution State.
Connecticut’s for fucking
While we’re waiting to
Turn into the people
everyone here turns into.
Connecticut’s for fucking.
There’s nothing else to do.
I wanna listen to classic rock and have sex with you.
We all love to fuck in Connecticut.
We’re all getting fucked in Connecticut.
Let’s fuck!
Here’s a little back story. I first posted this almost three years ago and then sent the link to their “Contact us” link on their site just so they knew they had some supporters out there. I got back a sarcastic e-mail. I responded with a kind of “geez, I’m just trying to give you guys a little extra free publicity.” I assumed it was just some record company P.R. peon I was dealing with. Turns out it was the lead singer. Since then we have e-mailed occasionally and she gave me permission to reference their band in my novel. About two months ago I got a Facebook invitation to attend their concert in NYC this weekend, so that’s where I’ll be Saturday night. They are a very funny, and very nice band, so please if you are so inclined, visit their site or download this song or others from itunes. Trust me, if you listen to this song you’ll laugh from start to finish.