A Lot of Talk About Balls

For a couple days this week the world’s leading story was about balls. No, they haven’t found a cure for testicular cancer. Everyone, at least in the U.S., was talking about American footballs.  Hashtags such at #Deflategate and #shrinkage were both world leaders this week. I thought to myself, “Well if everyone is talking about balls I can write about it and make some sophisticated high brow jokes on the subject.

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When I went to find some funny pictures on the subject I typed the topic “football funny” into the Google Images search box and Google showed me a page full of pictures of European people and South American people and African people and Middle Eastern people and Australian people  kicking around this round, black and white checkered ball. It seems that some of those people that live in other countries play a game called football but they use a different ball! Color me intrigued, I thought to myself. Ok, no I didn’t. And please shoot me if you ever hear my say “Color me…” anything. Who says that? European football players I bet.

Upon making this mind blowing discovery I was incensed. Furious. Up in arms. How dare these foreigners steal the name of our game and use it for a game that seems to require only sissies in shorts play it? Don’t they know we’re the United States? We’ve been a country for over 300 years! We’ve been playing American football for 75 years now and these other countries think they can just steal our idea and warp it to fit their weird foreign standards!

I’d better let the government know about this! They might want to go bomb all these countries that stole our idea! Typical. We Americans come up with a great idea and the rest of the world steals it and acts like they thought of it. For instance, as I did research for this eye opening Phil Factor I discovered that England stole our idea of democracy and created some kind of parliamentary system for their government.

Ok, I’ve got to fess up here. I got nothing else. I had a really busy week and all week long my mind couldn’t settle on anything for my Saturday Phil Factor. This is the one that I usually put a little more time and thought into because I imagine people getting up, making a cup of coffee and watching the news and maybe doing a little Facebook or blog reading. I do have an idea though about the power of the hashtag to raise awareness, but of what I don’t yet know. Anyway, have a great Saturday. ~Phil

10 responses to “A Lot of Talk About Balls

  1. I could write a blog about balls
    It wouldn’t resemble this one at all

    Liked by 2 people

  2. I must admit I wasn’t expecting a post about football either 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I’m in Indianapolis, and so it was all over the place here. Since I’m not really into balls of that sort, the fact that it was also on EVERY NEWS CHANNEL like some kinda natural disaster was extremely annoying. The Colts would not have won, regardless of whatever the naughty Patriots were up to this time. #footballisboring

    Liked by 1 person

  4. My Brit-husband has been in the States 25 years and still mentions – without fail every week that I have the tube tuned to The Footie – that there is no “foot” in American football. Maybe the balls make up for it.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Ugh. It’s so annoying when I see or hear this uneducated question; “when does the ball ever touch your foot bleh bleh snuff snuff snuff..”

    It’s called football because it’s played on foot not a horse.

    Also – Y U Care so much?

    Like

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