Tag Archives: The Phil Factor

Is Chuck Norris Really Dead?

Posted on March 20, 2026 | Leave a comment

I’m not trying to make light of the passing of Chuck Norris. I’m trying to celebrate all that Chuck brought to us over the years. Some of what follows is a re-run of my blog from 2014 when Chuck Norris was on fire on the internet.

Photo credit: my neighbors

See that picture? Can you tell me with absolute certainty that’s not Chuck Norris  on the right? I know my title says Jesus was the first Chuck Norris and I know that’s Joseph on the right, but you’ve got to think that the son grew up to look a little like his dad right?

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I’ve been doing a little investigating, like in a Dan Brown novel, and I’ve come to the conclusion that in one form or another humans have always worshipped a Jesus/Chuck Norris figure. The similarities between the two are startling. The beard, the followers: (Jesus had 12 disciples, Chuck Norris has Twitter), the incredible feats defeating evil. It’s all there throughout history. They’re the same person. Maybe when Jesus rose from the dead he didn’t go to heaven but instead continued to walk the Earth as Chuck Norris.

Let’s put this theory to the test.  I’m going to borrow several statements from the internet and history and plug both their names in and see if they’re interchangeable.

If you have 5 dollars and Chuck Norris has 5 dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.

If you have 5 loaves and fishes and Jesus has 5 loaves and fishes, Jesus has more loaves and fishes than you.

Chuck Norris knows Victoria’s Secret.

Jesus knows your sins.

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Jesus was put to death, but didn’t really die and rose from the dead three days later.

Chuck Norris has never really died either, unless you count his movie career.

The bible, a book, is full of stories about Jesus.

The internet, a modern reading device, like a book, is full of Chuck Norris fact lists.

So, as you can see, the Jesus/Chuck Norris themes are similar throughout history. If they are the same guy wouldn’t that then mean that the bible is just a book of Chuck Norris jokes?

This post came about as a result of my neighbors nativity set that’s in the picture at the top. My son and their kids are friends and when we were dropping their son off following an afterschool activity a couple years ago I said, “Hey, Noah, why is there a statue of Chuck Norris on your lawn?”  They recently posted that picture of their Chuck Norris nativity set on Facebook and tagged me.

I would like to sincerely offer my condolences to Chuck’s family. He was a wonderful actor and from what I’ve read about him,  he was an even better person to everyone who knew him. As always, if you enjoy my blasphemy, please share by hitting the Facebook, Twitter or re-blog buttons below. Have a great weekend! ~Phil

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The Doomsday Clock is Ticking…

Posted on February 11, 2026 | 2 comments

In case you didn’t know, there are some really depressing scientists who keep a “Doomsday clock” which gauges the human races chance of exterminating ourselves.  If the clock strikes midnight, that means our last days are nigh. About two weeks ago they declared that the Doomsday clock was at 85 seconds until midnight. Hmm… I wonder what they’re worried about. According to ThePhilFactor in 2017, it was at 100 seconds.

What a bunch of gloomy gusses. Their afterwork get togethers must be a drag.

“Hey Marty! Did you see that Trump invaded Greenland against the wishes of everyone else on Earth.”

Marty: Awesome! It’s my turn to update the clock.! If they go nuclear I’m putting it at 75 seconds! (then he rubs his hands together at this joyous news)

It is 85 second until midnight, according to the Doomsday Clock.

That picture above is the happy little group revealing their pride and joy Doomsday clock.  What I wonder is do these people have other jobs? Or, do they grab a martini and sit around their lab waiting for bad news. I know it’s probably a depressing job, but I’m also wondering how they replace a member who died? Will I see that job posting on LinkedIn?  Seriously, how cool would Doomsayer look on my resume! If that doesn’t attract chicks, I don’t know what does. That’s really true, I don’t know what attracts chicks. If my romantic life had a Doomsday clock it would have hit zero already.

The Doomsday gang are referred to as The Bulletin of Atomic Scientists. From AI: Maintained since 1947, the Clock is a proxy mechanism for threats to humanity from unchecked scientific and technological advances. The Clock’s original setting in 1947 was seven minutes to midnight. It has since been set backward eight times and forward 19 times. The farthest time from midnight was 17 minutes in 1991, and the closest is 85 seconds in 2026. That’s all well and good, but I want names. I want to interview one of these clowns to learn more. I want accountability.

There they are! But what are they smiling about?!!? There’s nothing funny about the end of life on the planet. I want some serious mf’ers setting that clock. If you’d like to watch the “Town Hall” regarding the most recent setting of the Doomsday Clock you can find it HERE. It’s 90 minutes long. That must be a fun watch. Why does it take them an hour and a half to say “We’re all going to die!”

I imagine that these were the kids in elementary school who would scream “Were all going to die!” when the fire alarm went off.  But why reveal their life’s depressing work on a boring little college presentation. I wanted to see that during the half-time show in the Super Bowl.  Bad Bunny would finish his life affirming, uniting song and then as he exits this morose little group gets up to a podium and Al Michaels say, “These folks are going to tell us how long the world gets to live.” Then Chris Collinsworth chips in with “That’s right Al, I sure hope the Earth lasts another 90 minutes because we’ve got a barn burner of a game going on tonight!

That’s right! They have a newsletter! I signed up for the newsletter so I’ll know when the Earth is going to end before you do! Should I see if I can get an interview with one of those scientists?

Happy Wednesday! Let’s hope it’s not our last! Especially because I’ve got a couple blog posts ready for the weekend! Thanks for reading! ~Phil

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The Ten Best Super Bowls

Posted on February 7, 2026 | 2 comments

It’s “Super Bowl weekend” here in the States and most people will watch the big  game. It occurred to me that while this Bowl is undeniably super, is it the best bowl? There are so many bowls in this world, but which is the best? Here’s my choices:

The Bowl Haircut

Picture credit TheRightHairstyles.com

Apparently now people are doing this on purpose?!!? When I was a little kid and didn’t have any choice in what my parents did to me, we dreaded the “bowl cut.” It was never a good look, even on a four year old.

The Hollywood Bowl, Los Angeles

9. The Hollywood Bowl: Since 1922 The Hollywood Bowl has been one of the largest outdoor music venues in the country. The “bowl” refers to the shape of the concave hillside the amphitheater is carved into. Bands that have played there: The Beatles and everyone else you’d care to know about. Seating capacity: Around 26,000.  When I take The Phil Factor on tour, my first live event will be at The Hollywood Bowl.

8. The KFC Famous Bowl

Otherwise known as “Heart attack in a bowl.” Truth be told, this is really what killed Pope Francis last year. Rumor has it that he was sending cardinals out for the KFC Famous Bowl every night.

7. The Bedrock Bowl

You have to be over 50 to ride this ride. The Flintstones was The Simpsons before The Simpsons. It was the first prime time cartoon. I never saw it live of course, but I saw the re-runs plenty when I was a bowl cut wearing little kid.

6. The Margarita Bowl:

There have been many “bowl” incarnations of margaritas. This one is called the Crackin’ Kitchen Diamond Head Margarita Bowl. This one comes from the Crackin’ Kitchen in Honolulu, Hawaii.

5. The Fish Bowl

The good, regular, old-fashioned fish bowl that we all wanted in our room when we were kids. If you don’t want to watch the Super Bowl this Sunday, you can also watch “The Fish Bowl”, which will be broadcast by the National Geographic channel. According to The Washington Post “it will feature an unknown goldfish named Goldie swimming around a bowl for four hours. A promotional video for the show promises that it will “blow the competition out of the water.” 

4. The Super Bowl:

Look, I already watch a lot of football games. This is just another one and it rarely lives up to the hype.

3. Corelle Soup/Cereal Bowls:

According to Amazon, this is their best selling set of bowls. If Amazon doesn’t represent the consensus on best bowls, I don’t know what does. With 11,299 five star reviews, these must be some pretty damn good bowls!

2. The Big Lebowlski:

Ok, The Big Lebowski isn’t exactly a bowl, but why didn’t they name it The Big Lebowlski? One extra letter and it would have all made sense. If you’ve never seen it, it’s a funny movie with a lot of scenes in a bowling alley.

1. The Bacon Bowl (as seen on The Phil Factor)

Yes, this is a real thing and you can buy it on Amazon. You can make the bowl for your food OUT OF B-A-C-O-N !!! This is not fake. You can buy the bacon bowl building device right on this Amazon link. Sadly, I’m not getting any endorsement fees no matter how many of you buy the Perfect Bacon Bowl.

Those are my Top Ten Best Bowls. What are yours? Do you have any other bowls you’d like to add to the list? Please do so in the comments!

Have a great weekend! ~Phil

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Why Bad Bunny Is Neither

Posted on February 7, 2026 | 5 comments

Speaking of Bad Bunny, in the words of Donald Trump, “I’ve never heard of him. I don’t know who he is, I don’t know why they’re doing it – it’s, like, crazy. They blame it on some promoter they hired to pick up entertainment. I think it’s absolutely ridiculous.”

That’s really funny because I said the same thing when Donald Trump was elected. But let’s get back to the title topic…

Is Bad Bunny really bad? Is he really a bunny? In the picture above, he won a bunch of Grammy’s, the annual awards for good music. Getting all those awards implies that he is very good at what he does.

Donald Trump doesn’t have a cache of trophies like that. All he has is a re-gifted Nobel from winner Maria Corina Machado.

Look at those pictures. One is a bunny and the other is the gentleman known as Benito Antonio Martínez Ocasio. If I have only one complaint about Bad Bunny it’s the length of his given name, which is why I only typed it once today.

That’s a funny hat, but it’s not bunny ears, so I’m going out on a limb and say that I believe Bad Bunny is not a bad and not a bunny.

As the judge in this case, I pound the table with my gavel and declare that Bad Bunny is neither bad nor a bunny. Enjoy the music when you watch the Super Bowl. I don’t know Spanish, but I still enjoy Bad Bunny’s music.

Have a nice evening and an even better Super Bowl Sunday! Thanks for reading! ~Phil

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Hey South! Calm Down, It’s Just Cold Air

Posted on January 25, 2026 | 1 comment

The annual snowpocalypse in the southeastern United States is happening today. For those of you from other countries, there are parts of the United States that get a lot of snow for about four months every year. I live in one of those unfortunate places. For us, getting a foot (30 centimetres) of snow overnight just means that we have to spend a little extra time clearing our driveway before we go to work. In the southeastern region of the United States they get snow about once a year, and when they get it, it’s about one to three inches (2-6 centimetres). What makes us Northerners laugh is their reaction to it, or rather their overreaction to it.

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Dear southern United States. You do know this is your fault right? The universe tries to make everything equal.  You can’t have warm temperatures and sunshine every day of the year. For most of the year you get sunshine and warm temps. Here comes the pay back. I’m not taunting you. I’m just trying to educate you. I live in the northeast. It’s like this about half the year.

Calm down. It’s not the end of the world. This happens almost daily in the northeast. Toughen up buttercup. It’s just cold air and frozen water. You’ve chewed an ice cube, right. That didn’t kill you. This won’t either, …unless you’re stupid.

Maybe I’m just bitter because you will get the day off from work tomorrow while I’ll be working.

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Now I know that making fun of southerners reaction to snow is as easy as shooting fish in a barrel, which is apparently something they do in the South. Maybe that’s why they get so upset by snow. Maybe their barrels freeze over and they can’t shoot fish. We’ve all seen news footage of people fleeing a hail of bullets during a terrorist attack. That’s exactly how people in the south flee a hail of…well, hail. Although in the South they’ll try shooting back first, because everyone in the south in America is ‘packing’.

Have a great Sunday and stay safe folks. Snow is a real thing, and thank you for letting me remind you of that every year! Thanks for reading!

~Phil

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The Top Ten Banned Words of 2026

Posted on January 19, 2026 | 5 comments

Calm down free speech people! I’m on your side. No one is actually banning words or phrases, unless Trump has recently declared something idiotic.

Have you ever thought to yourself, “I am so sick of hearing that phrase!”?  Sometimes it’s an acronym at work. Other times it’s a pop culture phenomenon. Often it’s a word or phrase that another generation says that makes no sense to you.

Lake Superior State University is located in Michigan’s upper peninsula, which should really be part of Wisconsin or Canada. Each year they publish a list of the top ten words that people would like to see banned.

That is exactly the kind of hard hitting research you’ll find at a “state school.” I should know, because I went to one. Harvard is busy curing cancer, but Lake Superior State University is spending public money making lists of silly phrases. They are definitely my kind of people. Yes, you can definitely look up their list without reading all my commentary, but what fun is that? It’s none. Their list is  just 6-7 while my commentary is massive.

10. Reach out: It’s used so much that it’s meaningless. If so and so wanted to hear from me, I’m pretty sure they’d have texted. Hearing the phrase “reach out” immediately makes something sound unimportant. Just like my blog is reaching out to you right now.

9. My Bad? C’mon Lake Superior State,  I know that you’re only a “state school” but you’re re-using words from your previous banned lists. That is so mid.

8. Gifted: Why is this on the banned list? Lake Superior State is gifted with publicity every year because of this list and they’re making fun of it? That’s not even clever. What’s the substitute if we can’t say that someone genuinely gifted something? C’mon people! Offer solutions not problems! (I just made that up and now it’s trending on X.)

7. Perfect: I think it’s time for Lake Inferior State to start making this list only five words long. That would be Perfect. 

6. Full Stop: To be honest, I like this one, although it’s often overused in completely benign situations, it’s fun to say. For me, full stop is not a full stop. Although, you’re thinking that ThePhilFactor should come to a full stop most of the time.

5. Incentivize: Just another way of saying “Show me the money” and if you’re going to hate on the beautiful chemistry Tom Cruise and Renee’ Zellweger had in Jerry McGuire, you are dead to me.

4. Massive: Ok, I am massively in on how right Lake Superior State got this one. Very few things should be called massive. Mountains, a train that’s a mile/2km long, Jupiter compared with Earth. Seriously, if Jupiter went wildly out of orbit and hit the Earth, that would be a massive impact.

3. Cooked: Yes, state school people may use this word egregiously (yes, let’s do “egregiously” to the banned list for 2027.  I want this blog post to get a word on there. Mark your calendars for next year and use this word egregiously hard.

2. Demure: Maybe I’m too old to have friends that say demure. I don’t think I heard this word in 2025. Maybe it’s because I’m so demure and I don’t get out enough. (hint, hint, invite me to your parties this year.)

1. 6-7: C’mon, do we have to ban 6-7? I’m just getting the hang of it. It’s pretty much the younger generation goofing on the boomers who don’t get modern stuff. It means nothing and is just stupid, but it makes the kids happy. You Lake Superior State kids just keep saying it and just remember, C’s get degrees. Love your list.

Thanks for reading! ~Phil

 

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Today Find Me At My Other Blog!

Posted on January 4, 2026 | 6 comments

Today go visit me at my travel blog, https://philliverstravels.com/ , where I’m begining to explore the world and look for my new home! First stop, Mexico! I’m on my way there this morning. You can also follow my week in Mexico on Instagram where I’m Phillivers_Travels

Come with me, I don’t want to walk the Earth alone!

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That Time I Almost Won Survivor

Posted on December 17, 2025 | Leave a comment

Possibly me…

Every year when the new Survivor season ends I always wonder, “what if…”  What if that was me winning #Survivor?

Let’s take a little trip in the way back machine. It was September of 1999. The internet was so new that I was still getting a newspaper made out of actual paper! I’ve always been an avid sports fan and the first thing I’d do when I got my Sunday paper was to check the box scores from the Saturday college football games.

On page 2 of the sports section, I found a small classified ad looking for people to volunteer to be part of a filmed game show where contestants would spend a month on a remote island competing for ONE MILLION DOLLARS! 

This is how my inner monologue went: “I grew up camping in tents with my family every summer. I’m outdoorsy! I can’t eat pickles or mustard, but I’ve got no problem eating anything else. I know how to fish, so I can feed myself. I’m a young-ish man in decent shape. I spent a few years in college taking broadcasting classes, so I’m comfortable on camera. I can do this!  This is a no brainer. For a million bucks I can outlast a group of dolts on an island and parlay my new found stardom into a successful show biz career!”

Survivor Season 1 cast. Look at those dolts! I could have easily won.

With my inner voice cheering me on I began typing the email to the casting director at CBS, all but certain that I was on the road to riches and stardom. And then I talked to my wife…

How many men reading this know how that conversation went?

This is not me or my wife.

Her reply, which was justified, was “you’re not going to leave me home alone for a month with three young kids.” That was a fair response. I couldn’t argue with that.

Don’t we all have those “what if” moments in your life where you look back and wonder how your life could have been different? #Survivor is low on my list, but… what if?

Had I won that first season of Survivor you’d be listening to ThePhilFactor podcast and remembering how bad I was when they put me on Dancing with The Stars. Sure, I could eat the hell out of a dead racoon, but doing the Flamenco with Kathy Bates? …not so much. Maybe I’d be cohosting Survivor with what’s his name? You’re all tired of him by now, right?

So, in the comments, what’s your “what if?” moment that you wish you had a second shot at?

Have a great Wednesday and think of me when you’re watching Survivor!

Thanks for reading!~Phil

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My Recent Ghost Story

Posted on October 31, 2025 | 3 comments

As many of you know, my wife passed away in June. Prior to her passing, whether she was on home hospice or inpatient hospice, she had that bell next to her bed so that she could summon me if I happened to be out of the room. We all know what these bells sound like, right?

After her passing and the funeral, I placed her beautiful urn on a shelf in the living room, and next to it, I placed the bell.  A couple days later the bell rang…once. At least it sounded like the bell. I wasn’t in the same room when I heard it, so I looked around the house to see if there was anything else that could have caused that sound. I was the only person in the house and the cat was sound asleep, so it couldn’t have been him.

So I thought, “Well, one little ding. Maybe I imagined it.” Then two weeks later I heard the ding again. I still thought I could be imagining it or maybe it was a noise from outside of the house. The cat was of course sound asleep nowhere near the bell. A few weeks later, it happened again. Another single ding. That’s a pattern.

But the bell wasn’t the only hint that I might not be alone. About two weeks ago I was sitting at my desk in my home office when suddenly it felt like someone twirled their finger in my hair. Honestly, I can blame them, I have great hair. I checked the only heat vent in the room that was about 8 feet from me. Nothing. No air coming or going. It really felt like someone twirled their finger in my hair. Even though before my wife passed, I had told her to haunt me, that was a little unnerving.

That’s all I’ve had… in my home. On Tuesday of this week I was in a hotel in Boston due to work travel. After dinner in the hotel restaurant, I walked back to my room alone. When I came out of the elevator, I noticed what looked like a small, slightly bigger than a basketball, ethereal cloud moving slowly down the hallway on it’s own about 7 feet high. I reached up and touched it. I couldn’t feel anything, but me sticking my hand in it seemed to dissipate a chunk of it. It seemed to pause before continuing to float down the hallway. Not knowing what it was, I decided it was probably best to leave it be. If I’ve ever actually seen an actual ghost, that was it.

Six years ago I had a coworker who talked about ghosts and I thought she was nuts or attention getting. I never thought that I’d be that person.

So what do you think of my ghosty stories? Are there any logical things I’m overlooking?

Thanks for reading and Happy Halloween! ~Phil

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My Trip to The Future!

Posted on October 18, 2025 | 4 comments

I thought I was coming out to Southern California just to visit my son and have a cameo appearance in something he’s filming. Then, very shortly after getting off my plane, I realized that I had accidentally traveled into THE FUTURE. 

It is so very apropos that the future I found was in the Los Angeles area where Marty McFly traveled to the future. Some of you might already be here. It was also perfectly appropriate that in the 40th anniversary year of Back To The Future that I found my way to the future in a cool car just like Marty did.

Waymo self-driving car in front of Google’s San Francisco headquarters, San Francisco, California, June 7, 2024. (Photo by Smith Collection/Gado)

That car is what’s known as a Waymo. It’s like an Uber without a driver. They’ve existed for about 8 years in a handful of states. You summon one like you would an Uber but when it arrives, there’s no one in the car, which is a Jaguar by the way. When mine arrived it had my initials displayed in the screen of that little hat on the top of the car.

Once you get in, the car ominously locks the doors and moves forward and carefully slips into moving traffic. I sat in the front passenger seat. For music on the ride, the Waymo can be connected to your phone if you’d like or it offers a full library of playlists. I picked Electronic Dance Music (EDM) because that seems like the music that would be in a movie about a robot car kidnapping me.

The car drove as well or better than many of the L.A. drivers and I arrived safely. Yes, occasionally a Waymo will be involved in an accident, but to be honest, I trust a Waymo way more than other human drivers.

Driverless cars aren’t the only futuristic tech tools that have arrived in SoCal. If you walk around for about 5 minutes you’re bound to run into another mobile tech driven gadget.

These little robots are running around on the sidewalks delivering food. Yesterday I confronted one and it stopped. As soon as I stepped out from in front of it, it began to go forward. Big surprise. I wasn’t letting it off the hook that easy. I ran a circle around it, causing it to stop again, twice.

Interestingly, my son told me that there are actually people in India whose job is to be monitoring these little delivery robots just in case they run into a situation AI is not prepared for. Like me. (I did verify that is true)

As I ran around it, I saw the little camera, which looked like our normal car back up cameras, and I waved at the camera and stepped aside, making the day of someone in India. ( ThePhilFactor does get a lot of traffic from India due to previous posts about Hindi sexting. Hello my friends from India!) Also, apparently, you’re not supposed to ride the delivery robots. Smh.

I hope my message from the future will get to your outdated technology like cell phones and the old fashioned internet. Thanks again for reading me! If you’ve had some fun meeting with the future, please put them in the comments. I’d love to hear about them.  ~Phil

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