I don’t know about you, but where I live you can’t swing a dead cat without hitting a frozen yogurt shop anymore. Apparently somewhere someone published a study indicating there was a frozen yogurt shortage. I have nothing against frozen yogurt or the shop owners, but sadly, no matter how creative they are with their shop names there are just too many and at least half will be out of business in two years. That will be a loss to society if only because we will miss out on the creative genius of the people naming these shops.
Hilariously, every frozen yogurt shop name sounds either hip hop or sexual or both. Without further adieu, here are the The Best 11 Frozen Yogurt Shop Names:
11. Mo Gelato– What else can I say? Mo money, mo gelato!
10. Froyo Life– I like frozen yogurt, but I’m not centering my life around it. This sounds like a cult.
9. Yogomonster– Didn’t Godzilla battle the Yogomonster in one of those old black and white movies where they do a terrible job of dubbing the English over the Japanese?
8. Spoon Me– I’d like to suggest a possible tag line: Yogurt so good you’ll want to cuddle after.
7. Yo Sweets– this is how I call my wife from the other room when I’m feelin’ all hip hop and whatnot.
6. Yo Mama!– Brilliant name but it probably results in a lot of fights. Wife: “Honey, why are you late? Where were you?” Husband: “Yo Mama!”
5. 16 Handles– It would be awesome if Molly Ringwald owned one of these franchises. Actually, Anthony Michael Hall’s acting career is going so well he’s probably working at one of these.
4. Flavaboom– Just a cool name. I imagine the yogurt lackey throwing a handful of sprinkles on my yogurt and yelling, “Here it is! I’m bringin’ the Flavaboom!” Obviously he times the boom to coincide with the sprinkles hitting my yogurt.
3. Yolicious– This sounds like a great compliment. “Damn girl you are looking yolicious!” This is in fact my pet name for my wife and I included it here so all our friends will now call her that.
2. Big Gay Ice Cream Shop– You’d think I picked this place for inclusion on the list because of the name. Nope, it’s because of a menu item. They have a sundae called “The Salty Pimp.” I’d go there just to order this.
1. Yolickity– This is either going to be my rap name or a hip-hop porn movie.
Lastly, I know that Robbie Van Winkle is all busy with his home rehab reality show, but how does that guy not own a frozen yogurt shop called Vanilla Ice? As always, if you enjoy #ThePhilFactor please hit the Facebook, Twitter or other share button below. Have a great weekend!