TBT! Psychic or Psycho?

(7/12/2014) I’m sure that when it comes to the title question, you’ve already decided about me. Last weekend I had my first ever experience with a psychic medium. If she was any good she’d be called a psychic large. Am I right? A winery near me has a psychic medium doing tarot card readings every Sunday afternoon this summer. For $25 you get a glass of wine and your reading. Below are my cards. Truth be told, if she really is psychic she’d know that the flower print table cloth is a terrible idea for people who want to take pictures of their cards.

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I’ll tell you my mind set approaching this. I believe that psychic phenomena does exist, however, I am skeptical of those who claim to have psychic abilities. I take a “prove it to me” approach towards those individuals. I occasionally watch “reality” shows featuring psychics and much to Mrs. Phil’s frustration I will say things like, “Well, she’s just guessing!” or “You could interpret that any way you want.” Yes, Mrs. Phil refers to herself as Mrs. Phil and is proud to do so. Who wouldn’t be? Mrs. Phil also won’t watch certain shows with me anymore. I went into the reading determined not to give the psychic any information that would help lead her into general statements that I would then interpret through my point of view and believe she was psychic.

As soon as my psychic, Maren, dealt the cards I shouted “Blackjack!” Interestingly, just now as I typed “dealt” I accidentally added an “h” on the end of it, making it dealth which is only a letter away from death. Yes, I did get the death card. I didn’t panic because first of all, I’m Phil, and secondly, in writing a good novel your main character can be faced with three types of death: physical, romantic, or occupational. Think about novels you’ve read and you’ll see one or more of those themes in all of them. For me the psychic  surmised that the death card was related to a work situation. I didn’t lose my job, but recently found out that I wouldn’t be getting a highly coveted promotion I had been pursuing for a long time.  That’s one in favor of the psychic.

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To start the reading, I was asked to choose an identity card. She explained the traits of each and I was instructed  to choose the one that I felt reflected my personality the best. I wanted to choose the Knight of Swords but was told that I was too old to be a Knight, so I had to be a King. Obviously she wasn’t taking mental age into account. So of the Kings I chose the King of Wands. Maren laid this down and flipped over a card that completely covered my identity card. Her eyes got big and she immediately looked up at me. It was  the High Priestess card. “Are you psychic?” she said. “You’re either psychic or very intuitive.”

high priestess

I didn’t admit if I was psychic and allowed her to continue. She had laid out the cards in the Celtic Cross formation. I was pleasantly surprised that she was spot on accurate on a bunch of things and happily the final card of my reading was the Three Cups card seen below, which indicates a happy ending that apparently has nothing to do with a massage.  My interpretation of that is that in 4-5 months when my next book comes out you’ll all buy it and I’ll make the New York Times bestseller list. Don’t make the psychic a liar or she’ll curse you.

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As far as the last card being the celebration of some accomplishment, you’d think if her goal was to make her customers happy she would give that card to everyone. I cut the deck three times before she dealt. Mrs. Phil and two friends also had readings and none received similar interpretations in their readings. In our discussion after we discovered that everyone’s readings were different and everyone felt she was surprisingly accurate, even the two of us that went in as skeptics.  My verdict: I think this lady really did have some psychic abilities. At the end she handed me her business card which said “Maren’s Messages. ” I was a little disappointed it didn’t say Maren’s Massages.” A massage and a psychic reading in one? How awesome would that be?

Ok, I know this didn’t have as much funny as most Saturday Phil Factors, so here’s my idea: Tarot reading is primarily the act of memorizing the meaning of 78 cards, laying them out and telling the subject what each card means and letting them interpret it through their own prism. If I’m psychic or intuitive, in addition to the fact that I have a Master’s in Psychology and spent many years as a therapist, I imagine that I’d be pretty good at this process.  What if, as a party entertainer I did humor infused psychic Tarot card readings? “What? The Death card! Ummm….no I don’t take credit. You’ll have to pay cash. Right now.”  Or maybe, if someone gets The Three of Wands “Oh sorry. Your co-workers like you….the way adults like Justin Bieber.”  I’m pretty sure that if I studied the cards and put some thought into it I could come up with a bunch of smart ass lines. What do you think? Should I go into the psychic party entertainment business? Also, would anyone be interested in my interviewing the psychic for a Phil Factor post?

As always, if you enjoy #ThePhilFactor I’d love it if you’d share it by the Facebook, Twitter, or reblog buttons below. Also psychic readings are now available on The Phil Factor for $25. Have a great Thursday! ~Phil 

 

10 responses to “TBT! Psychic or Psycho?

  1. If a Phil Factor psychic reading is anything like this post, it will be a great read and a lot of fun 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I think that I would really like it
    If you were to become a psychic
    In fact I would be so excited
    I’d hire you to be my psychic

    (Yeah, now I’m really just looking for words that rhyme with psychic. I’m kind of impressed that I found any!)

    Liked by 3 people

  3. You could become a Psychic Therapist and toss about the humor to alleviate any qualms on the part of your client. A whole new career is about to careen into view!

    Liked by 2 people

  4. Phil, I would definitely be paying you the $25.00 just to be entertained, psychic or not!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Only $25? You undervalue yourself – I got at least $30 worth of chuckles out of the post alone!

    Like

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