Stephen Hawking Was Kind of A Debbie Downer

Last week the world mourned the passing of Stephen Hawking, one of the most respected and accomplished physicists on Earth. I’m sure that you looked at my title incredulously, in disbelief that I would speak ill of the dead so soon after his passing. Like Captain James Tiberius Kirk and the Enterprise, I am not afraid to go where no man has gone before.

Hawking’s final paper spells out how he sees the end of life in our universe occurring. Jeez! What a Debbie Downer. Who wants to know that? I want to imagine the Earth and our Universe going on in perpetuity. If the Earth is going to end at some point, do you want to know years ahead so you can worry about it? I sure don’t, but Stephen Hawking just had to rub our noses in it.

Another time he predicted that the Earth will eventually turn into a big ball of fire due to global warming. Come on, lighten up Francis! How about predicting something happy, like the Skittles rainbow becoming a reality? Those are the kinds of predictions I want from our scientists!

He also predicted that humans have about 100 years left on Earth before overpopulation and limited resources will force us to move to outer space. Great, thanks Steve. Say something like that but don’t offer a solution? What a gloomy Gus!

Once he threw a party for time travelers where he sent out the invitations after the party theorizing that the time travelers would travel back in time to go to the party. No one showed up. He said it was because time travel didn’t exist. I think they didn’t show up because they didn’t want to hang out with Steve and his dire predictions. He was probably terrible at small talk at parties.

Me: Hey Steve, what do you think of the Yankees chances this year?

Hawking: It does not matter. The Earth is going to explode before then. We will all be dead.

Me: (holding up my cell phone) Oh! I’m getting a call. Gotta go. (walks away, pretend talking on the phone)

In 2016 he also predicted that artificial intelligence, i.e.  robots would be taking over the Earth. Considering his voice, that’s sounds like wishful thinking coming from him.

He also predicted that if aliens visit the Earth, they’re going to be hostile! Did he not see E.T.?

Is it just me or does it seem like Little Steven had an apocalypse fixation. Like all the other apocalypse nuts that predict the end of the Earth every year, Hawking appears to be the boy who cried wolf and then made his grand exit before he could be proven wrong.

And he’s allegedly British. His accent does not sound British at all to me. Probably another tall tale! Fake news!

Yes, I know I was taking a risk with this so soon after his passing, but I wanted to challenge myself and you to find humor in a sad situation. I didn’t mean any disrespect and I assume that Mr. Hawking, who had a sense of humor,  would also be able to laugh at himself. Besides, #ThePhilFactor was his favorite blog.

Have a great Saturday! ~Phil

65 responses to “Stephen Hawking Was Kind of A Debbie Downer

  1. LOL – well, I am just imagining him right now sitting at the side of God the Father and smiling happily

  2. You do like putting the cat among the pigeons, don’t you!
    But I kinda agree with you on the downer thing… I’d like the Skittles rainbow to be confirmed as a future possibility too, rather than knowing life as we know it may not be there in a century!

  3. Top banana Phil and a strangely fitting tribute. The man who laughed at MND and spent a life trying to unify quntum mechanics with the big stuff. Mind you, Big Hair Man of the Discovery Channel Alien thingy has absolute view on past aliens on earth… looking about th3 local town I’m rather sold on current ones too….even low level artificial intelligence. Most certainly aren’t alive through conscious abilities… #conspiracy is it called the autonomous system for a reason? Obviously it is biologically…or we’ve been sold that too… Moot debate really, when YellowStone implodes then Worlds End is nigh….although wasn’t that a film too? Cornetto Trilogy, Simon Pegg thing… time to die…although that’s Bladerunner too… eek the world is a big film after all

  4. Yeah, I am all for a Skittles Rainbow versus Earth is a Big Ball of Flames scenario too.

  5. The Skittles Rainbow becoming a reality is the type of prediction I want, too! And I’m sure Mr. Sinister Steve would not demote your blog to second or third favorite if he was here reading this.

  6. Well, will have to go deep into Hawking’s papers to clearly get to the bottom of what you are saying…..anyways, nice enjoyable post.

  7. Haha. He’s probably laughing at you out there, spread across the universe. And who knows how that will impact our future on Earth. 🙂

  8. Losing the Plot

    I am going to leave it at 👍 good post – anything more, and i’ll Run the risk of getting caught up in Malthusian Principals, and population equations, evolution towards arid saline environments; boring the pants off everyone…. oh! Oops 😬

    Great post 👍 😁

  9. It’s funny seeing my name used in this way. It’s a not a phrase we use much down here but hey I’m happy to be mentioned in the same sentence as Stephen Hawking 😊 I did enjoy your post Phil.

  10. I think he would have enjoyed this, Phil. I know I did.

  11. If he was on The Big Bang than anything goes. PS I didn’t know we only had 100 years left!!

  12. Wow, he really was a Debbie downer. If he really made all those false predictions, his accountability as one of the smartest men to live is questioned in my mind. Those were out landish predictions he made. Geeze.

  13. This is so bad, I laughed out loud the whole way through! Ha!

  14. I’m surprised you didn’t mention that the time-traveling robots faked his death!

    Are… are you in on it?

  15. Phil, you always make me laugh out loud and I can totally believe that this still is his fav blog!! Some of his peers from Cambridge have said he was a right joker using his wheelchair in all sorts of ways to trick them, and Eddie Redmayne said he was the funniest man he ever met….I am sure he is up there right now trying to arrange the Skittles rainbow for us!!!

  16. Stephen Hawkins did have a wicked sense of humour so I’m sure he would’ve had a witty reply to your writing. Unlike myself who can’t think of one right now. Though we should heed his warnings though the world won’t. We never learn. On that cheery note. It’s bye from me!!

    • Although he was a physicist, I believe he was probably right about the environmental issues and hopefully the world will listen to his advice posthumously

      • I hope so too. I have read so much about the problem of plastic, it wasn’t until we started travelling more than I realised even more how massive the problem is and of course other issues. A bit overwhelming for the average person!

  17. I hope we have 100 years. I was thinking about six months.

  18. Oh what an unusual but relevant thought. He wasn’t the most positive man (universe wise) but then again, he inspired so many people!

  19. I think if one is going to scare the bejeebers out of everyone the need to hang around for the grand finale. Rofl.

  20. He will be sadly missed. Rip Stephen he is now within the stars. Great guy love and light. Did you all also read about his recent studies before his passing about future updates and predications some seem Abit scary if you ask me.

  21. Ha ha! I loved reading this! I know what you mean about the “debbie downer” thing…it does seem that scientists like to predict doom and gloom instead of finding out nice things for us to look forward to! Maybe he knew that the Skittles rainbow would become a reality in the near future, but didn’t want to spoil the surprise for us 😉

  22. Nice one. I had no idea his predictions were so grim – thank you for enlightening me 🙂 He was an amazing man. I loved the movie The Theory of Everything. Thanks

  23. oh you are right though. He would’ve been such a Debbie downer to have around. Also, it always really annoyed me that with the advances of modern technology that he couldn’t ever sort a British accent for his “voice”. I think it was pure laziness if you ask me. Lazy, lazy Steve.

  24. You are too funny! I would have predicted you’d get a lot of reaction to this post, but clearly, you are! Congrats!

  25. Most of his theories are wrong anyway. Black holes indeed! If a black box is orange then logic dictates that so is a hole for heavens sake 🙄

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