The Unemployment Diaries: Day 1

For the first time in over 30 years, I don’t have a job. As will happen occasionally, if you work for corporate America, you get laid off. I’m not going to bash my former company. They treated me well for a long time.  What I am going to do is chronicle my adventures as I try to find things to do when I have nothing to do.

My initial impression of what happens to guys who lose their job is Michael Keaton in Mr. Mom:

I posted the picture of me at the top so you can see what I look like on Day 1. Who knows? Maybe on Day 28 I will have a beard and be walking around the house in a robe. Or maybe I’ll have a funny, kick-ass blog. I didn’t do it today, but I intend to go to video blogging occasionally. I’ve never done it, but have always wanted to.

Being without a job is freeing. I’ve spent over 30 years going to work at least 40 hours a week. So, having some time off is why I’m smiling in the picture above. Also yesterday, all alone in my house, I did a little bit of this:

I really did dance around my house for no reason yesterday, but it was to Green Day. I couldn’t pull off Tom Cruise’s slide across the floor in my socks because I have carpeting. If I could have, you would have seen it because I would have filmed myself sliding by the laptop camera.

You’re probably wondering if my Unemployment Diaries series of blog posts is just going to be references to 80’s movies. The answer is, I don’t know. I honestly don’t know where my mind will take me when I have this much unstructured free time.

So far today I endured a brief panic when I thought the toaster didn’t work. Briefly, I wondered if I could eat my dog if things got too dire. Fortunately I figured out the toaster issue. Her life is saved, for now. Actually, I probably won’t eat her. When I was on the phone with my former company’s human resources department being told I was laid off, my dog was in the corner throwing up on the rug. She knows how to read the room.

Then I had an argument with Amazon’s Alexa device which resulted in me shouting “Shut up Alexa” and storming out of the room. She is just such a fecking know it all. I fear that my relationship with Alexa may not survive this.

Stay tuned…  ~Phil

39 responses to “The Unemployment Diaries: Day 1

  1. I’m interested to know where this adventure takes you.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Great first blog!! Keep them coming. BTW Alexa and I have a strained relationship, she tells me too often what she can’t do for me….

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Enjoy this time!!! Looking forward to hearing about your new adventures!!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Phil is this a temporary layoff and you go back to your job or do you have to look for a new one? You would not imagine how little you get done when you have a whole lotta free time. Take it from me. And best of luck. Can’t wait to hear about your shenanigans! 😀

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I posted the picture of me at the top so you can see what I look like on Day 1. Who knows? Maybe on Day 28 I will have a beard and be walking around the house in a robe.

    Walking around the house in a robe is acceptable, walking around the neighborhood in a robe is not.

    Remember that. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  6. I am so excited for you to share your new adventures with us!
    And if you do chose to do the video blog ~ consider allowing me to share some online banter blogging with you…
    If you can handle the Ms.Mae😉

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Well, it’s like a new door opening, isn’t it? That’s what I got told when I once got laid off. I just kept looking for that new door – apparently, they are invisible but lead to new beginnings. Just don’t slam them as hard as you did when you had that row with Alexia.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Happy New Year Phil! Sorry about the job loss and I pray that you get something that really suits you

    Like

  9. Great that you can start your layoff feeling so positive. There are bound to be some tough time but with any luck things this will lead to better things.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. I sent you an e-mail. Best wishes.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. A bit of down time will you do the world if good and reset your priorities… Or so I imagine! Enjoy the peace

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Sorry to hear about your layoff, Phil. Hopefully you’ll find something soon, so you can stop dancing in your underwear. Or if you get good enough, you might find a job doing that. That wasn’t why your dog was throwing up, right? I was laid off a few years ago and it was rather stressful. I ended up only have two weeks off between jobs, so I got my butt back to work. Now that I’m newly retired, I’ll have to learn from you as to how to fill all that free time.

    Liked by 1 person

  13. Can’t wait to see how this unfolds

    Liked by 1 person

  14. You’ll enjoy it for a week or two and then be bored to tears. That’s how I see myself when I retire in a couple of years. It’s a little scary! ~Elle

    Liked by 1 person

  15. Been there, the combination of freedom and dread. Good luck on where this takes you next!

    Liked by 1 person

  16. “When I was on the phone with my former company’s human resources department being told I was laid off…”
    Wait a second! You got laid off over the phone? WTF? They didn’t deserve someone with your special combination of good looks and personality. Screw ‘em. Good luck in your job search.

    Liked by 1 person

  17. This post cracked me up! Here’s to new chapters, Phil!

    Liked by 1 person

  18. Hang in there Phil! I was laid off in October 2018 and it has been both frustrating and joyous…really! Don’t look back because you have greater things ahead of you to focus on….mainly that fabulous next opportunity right around the corner.

    Liked by 1 person

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