Come on, 70’s and 80’s kids! You know the words. Sing along with me! 🎶 Love, exciting and new! Climb aboard, we’re expecting you! 🎶 As a young, naive kid I never realized what a sexual innuendo that was. But now I do and I want more!
With Valentine’s Day being tomorrow, love is in the air and damn it, I wish it was in the sea as well. As someone whose childhood occurred in the 70’s and 80’s I have fond memories of watching the long running hit tv series The Love Boat. If you’re not overly familiar, it was obviously about a cruise ship with it’s regular crew, but the rest of the cast was different b-list celebrities each week that would play the roles of horny vacationers on a cruise trying to hook up. It was 250 episodes of 80’s corny cheesiness, and it was good.
Despite the fact that even before Covid, cruises were already floating petri dishes of disease, people still love cruises and the cruise culture unlike anything else. Cruises weren’t the big thing when The Love Boat was on TV, but they are now. And that is why I’m creating this literary call to action.
Remember all my claims of psychic abilities? Today, just out of the blue, The Love Boat popped into my head and I decided to watch an episode of it on CBS All Access during my lunch hour. After that stroll down memory lane, I decided to write this post. Just now as I’m writing this on Thursday night, looking for pictures to use, I came across a news article about The Love Boat cast reuniting TONIGHT , live, to benefit a charitable cause. I swear on my own life that I did not see or hear anything previously, but there it is, the ghosts of Love Boat past were speaking to me. Also, in doing my research I discovered that Florence Henderson/Carol Brady was the most frequent Love Boat guest with 9 appearances. Coincidentally, if we’re playing six degrees of separation, I can be connected to Florence Henderson with only one person between us. Coincidence or fate? I think you know the answer to that.
At first it was just a whisper like a soft summer breeze through the willow trees and it said, Phil, we need you. Then I heard a ships fog horn in the distance. Then once again Phil, we need you… When the universe speaks to me, sometimes I listen, so I replied: “Seriously, what the f*ck Rich!” (Rich is my neighbor who sometimes talks to me through the hedge like Tim Allen’s neighbor Wilson on Home Improvement.)
The voices replied, “If you build it they will come…”
And I was all like, “I don’t have a cornfield to mow down. Who is this?”
The voice said, “It’s me, Gavin McLeod, Captain Stubing. We need you Phil…”
“You need me? First of all, how are you talking to me? You can’t be a ghost if you’re not dead. Oh my God Captain Stubing! Are you dead? Did you die? Are you speaking to me from the other side?!!?”
Not Gavin Mcleod’s ghost replied, “No I’m not dead you idiot. This is 5G and my signal is fantastic. But we need you to bring back The Love Boat.
“But I can’t bring back The Love Boat. I’m not some network big wig.”
With his signal fading Captain Stubing whispered, “You’re Phil. You can do this. And besides, I gotta go. I’ve got a booty call with Betty White. And trust me, there’s nothing like a little Betty booty….” and then he was gone.
Fear not intrepid reader, I’m not going to nostalgically ramble on about a TV show from my childhood. I’m going to propose action. I want action from you and I want action from Netflix. I believe in you and I believe in me. I also believe in Netflix. Netflix brought us The Tiger King and now I want, nay demand, that Netflix bring us the king of the sea, The Love Boat. Let’s get the ball rolling by you clicking THIS LINK to go sign my petition at Change.org.
Together we can do this! Use one of the buttons below to share to your social media until we get enough signatures to persuade Netflix to produce the new Love Boat! Come on! You know you want to! Share… your friends will think it’s a hoot.
Have a great Valentine’s Day and may your love be exciting and new, just like all those Love Boat episodes! ~Phil
I was texting with a co worker yesterday who had planned a fun team building activity and I referred to her as a regular Julie McCoy, to which she sent me a pic of her . Another coincidence?
Obviously the 80’s pop culture gods want this to happen
In the meantime, you can get a weekly morsel of this pure 80’s cheese on Sunday nights at 6pm ET on MeTV.
But as long as we’re on the topic, let’s ask some serious questions that I need answered about this show:
1) How many times do you think “Doc” has had a venereal disease? For as much dick-slinging as he does, he’s bound to have more than his fair share of cases of the “carnal flu.”
2) What the hell is Julie’s problem? Every time she has a romantic encounter, she manages to blow it somehow…usually because she’s being a complete twat about something.
3) Did you ever notice how super-creepy Captain Stubbing is? Almost every woman he is romantically interested in is half his age, especially the one where he falls for the daughter of one his former flames.
That’s only the beginning…
Yep, I love all of that stuff about The Love Boat. I always loved how sleazy Doc’s character was.
I loved the Love Boat growing up! Great read Phil!
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