The New Love Boat (2023)

Love, exciting and new. Come aboard. We’re expecting you! If you can sing the rest of the lyrics, you are my people. Despite the fact that even before Covid, cruises were  already floating petri dishes of disease, people still love cruises and the cruise culture unlike anything else.

Yes, it’s nice to know that I effected some change, but this didn’t work out the way I planned. What am I talking about? I’m talking about how two years ago on this exact day I wrote THIS POST advocating for The Love Boat show to be revived, and god damn it was a hilarious post. Now two years later, which is about how long it takes to launch a new show, we have the new Love Boat.

I was hoping for corny plots and B-list celebs trying to hook up, but what I got is a reality dating show. Essentially it’s the same thing; people who can’t act trying to hook up on the Lido deck.

Jerry, I loved you in Stand By Me, but what the hell happened to your eyebrows? Are those real? You know, in a year or two when you stop dyeing them, they’re going to be full on mad scientist eyebrows. Am I the only one that thinks of him as Scary Jerry now? OK, OK, I guess it’s just sour grapes on my part because they didn’t choose me to host the new Love Boat show. Not even a writer credit or anything. I hope it tanks.

Are any of you reading this watching the show? Let me know in the comments if it’s any good?

Have a great Monday and a Happy Valentine’s Day! ~ Phil