Who Wants Celebrity Nipples?

Who doesn’t want celebrity nipples? Am I right? Admit it, we’ve all thought, “I wish my nipples looked more like (Seth Rogen, Queen Elizabeth, Kathy Bates, Kevin James etc.) ” Well now your dreams have come true! With a little cosmetic surgery your nipples can look just like those of any celebrity in the world, even mine! (Although, I would charge you a fee to have my nipples. I’ve trademarked them just in case someone wants to copy them)

Right now, you have three options. You can A) Read THIS ARTICLE from BusinessInsider.com. (Way to go Business Insider. You’re definitely not going for salacious views at all by putting boobs on your “business” website) B) View the following video by the New York Post about women who want Kendall Jenner’s nipples, or C) Don’t click anything and just read me making fun of this.

So how many of you just zipped to option C to hear what kind of wisdom I’ll be dispensing today? Although it was the above video that caught my attention on Twitter, women aren’t the only ones who undergo plastic surgery to look like celebrities. Surprisingly, many men do it too. If you really want your stomach turned, read THIS Phil Factor post from 2014 about a man who, with the help of plastic surgery, tried to be a Justin Bieber look alike. I don’t know if he has Justin Bieber nipples, and I don’t want to know. (when the search engine bots pick up on the phrase Justin Bieber nipples my blog is going to get a ton of views.)

You know what? I don’t care if anyone gets any surgery to look like anyone else. More power to you. What I am incensed about is that plastic surgery and cosmetic alterations are so much more acceptable for women. If a man gets calf implants, Channing Tatum nipples and lip botox, suddenly he’s looked at differently.  Not that I need any plastic surgery of course, I’m Phil, but in doing “research” for this post I found an article online about the ten most popular plastic surgeries for men. So, step back ladies, you’re not the only ones that want to look pretty!

If you’ve got the money, you can turn into Dr. Frankenstein’s monster with parts from all your favorite celebrities! I imagine a future (don’t I always see the future?) where you go to a plastic surgeons office like you’d go to McDonald’s and choose your look from a menu of celebrities and their parts. “I’d like a  David Beckham with a side of Brad Pitt, but instead of the sideburns, give me a Chris Hemsworth chin.”

My plan is to create and open a chain of these places that cater to Canadian women. I’ll name it Chick Phil, Eh?  (I know at least one of you will get that joke and appreciate itSo, on a different note let’s end this with a poll:

Have a great weekend! ~Phil

50 responses to “Who Wants Celebrity Nipples?

  1. Gotta say I wouldn’t do the whole surgery thing… and why would you want to look like someone else?
    You know… butt of Jenny Lopez, boobs like -actually I like mine! Lips of Angelina Nokia.. .
    So… where do I sign up???

  2. I am always astonished to hear about what plastic surgeons can change/alter on the human body, and that there are people out there using this surgery to look like a celebrity. I would never be able to do something so drastic – the furthest I’d go to look like a celebrity is copy a makeup look, which I can wash off and forget about at my leisure.

  3. Losing the Plot

    Erm… no chance. I’m a long way from perfect but at least I’m me, and that’ll do

  4. If I could have a hip meat implant put in to unhollow things over there I’d do it in a heartbeat, but surgery would not be an option for me because of my jackass tumor that would only grow again. Other than that, no. I’ll let things fall as they may. And there’s no way in hell I would go to your chain of plastic surgery offices, you hoser.

  5. How much!! 2 for 1? Your headline certainly caught my eye and post had me LOL-ing! .

  6. When I saw your title I thought you were selling!! 😂😂😂

  7. I have fake boobs after double boobectomies, BUT NO NIPPLES! My surgeon did way too thorough a job. I could get nipple tattoos and have the surgery to get two little “nubs” but why, Phil? After almost five years, I’m used to them just the way they are…
    BTW, this is the subject of one of my boob reports yet to be posted!

  8. Love the Chick Phil, eh? name. I reckon it’s a winner!

  9. wow! In developing countries, we have different issues to take care of but in the US, well …..
    Only a select and niche part of Indian society will consider that. Anyways, “fake body part” is not that popular here

  10. Highly misleading headline, I may sue… I was assuming you had a repertoire of available celebrities still attached to theirs on the available list…but no, no, no… come get your bits cut up and have these carcinogenic attachments inserted. What? You didn’t read the microfilm T&C’s?

    Top drawer again Phil. Although my personal belief is genuine medical reason then fine…otherwise bugger off!

    • Misleading? Who’s to say I don’t have celebrity nipples for sake? You don’t know!

      • Lol, I was referring to said nipples still being attached to said celebrities 😂

      • Whose to say I don’t have a couple of those locked in a special area of my cellar? Are you looking for the nipples of someone specific? (this is getting weird isn’t it?)

      • Oh my, I’m certain algorithms are now tracking this… or soon will be. I trust this cellar is comfortable. Have to say I’d not actually got as far as someone specific… as we say to kids…. that’s a think, not say 😂

  11. I don’t see anything wrong with plastic surgery, and it’s always seemed weird to me that some people do. I mean, we’re all about therapy and yoga retreats and waxing hair off our bodies or drawing it onto different parts of our bodies and this is just one more thing you can do. Basically, if there’s something you don’t like about yourself, change it. It’s your body, why shouldn’t you be happy with it? And what business is it of mine what it takes for you to be happy in it?

  12. so where is the catalog with all these nipples pictured for selection?

  13. Surprisingly in the majority with a no vote!

  14. I think plastic surgery has gone mad! People don’t look real anymore.

  15. I think if someone wants to get plastic surgery, they can do what they want. I personally wouldn’t but to each their own.

  16. We have a waiting list for hip surgery and if I got into nipple surgery before my hip surgery well nothing would be pretty. Serious note people have to realize this is surgery and their are complications i.e. infections that can incur. Always enjoy the visit. PS another rant my hip surgery is delayed again because the OR is being used for nipple surgery. OMG I could go on……

  17. Seriously. Why. There is something DEEPLY wrong in a world where we want our nipples to look like other people’s. I can understand wanting plastic surgery for birth defects and medical reconstruction. For sure, definitely. But, to try and look like someone else just because you don’t like looking like yourself makes me think we’re far from sane.
    I do use pictures of celebrities at times as ideas for haircuts. Is that the same thing? If we could grow multiple nipples if a bad nipple job happened, would it be more socially acceptable?

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  19. Love this post!

  20. I am to scared of the after effects to have plastic surgery, Phil. It also often has to be redone at a later date; all that pain. Even tattooing on eyeliner has its repercussions; as you get older apparently the lines drop.

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