The Top Ten Amish Sex Positions (2023)

I knew it. I knew you couldn’t resist the title. I can’t blame you. I’d click on this too. We all love the mysterious Amish and we all wonder what goes on behind closed doors, or is it closed barn doors? The Amish sure seem to have a lot of kids and I’m pretty sure they’re not getting them by cloning or in-vitro fertilization. The Amish make their kids the old fashioned way, or ways, ten to be exact. Consider this post the new Amish Kama Sutra. Enjoy the list you perverts!


10. The Butter Churn move

9. The Barn Raiser

8. Milk your own cow

7. The Downward Hog

6. The Lancaster

5. The Bonnet Comet

4. The Pennsylvania Dutch Oven

3. The Suspender Bender

2. The Guilty Quilty

1. The Horse & Buggy

Yes, I know you were hoping for different kinds of pictures, but that’s what the rest of the internet is for. If you thought this was funny, please feel free to share it with your equally perverted friends by hitting one of the social media sharing buttons below. Have a great Tuesday! ~Phil

34 responses to “The Top Ten Amish Sex Positions (2023)

  1. , I will never think of the Amish quite the same. It’ll be hard to visit the Amish bakery with a straight face.

  2. Milk your own cow! That one does sound decidedly Amish. Probably because they tend to be a highly self sufficient, hands-on type of culture… 😂

  3. Very funny, Phil. Sort of dirty without being dirty if you know what I mean.

  4. Wicked, wicked – i LOVE it!

  5. Phil ~
    I would love to share your post. However, if you churn my butter ~ I will churn yours! Lol

  6. Laughing so hard right now at work! Although I’m still trying to figure out the “Lancaster”!

  7. LOL. Best click bait on the planet.

  8. There’s not a single one of these I’d be brave enough to Google.

  9. Losing the Plot

    Aw ffs! The Barn Raiser didn’t make the the to 10, oh well 😔


  10. These sound more like Amish Yoga positions. “The Downward Hog”

    Someone doing yoga has a dirty mind O.o

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  12. Technically, #8 is more of a technique than a position…. but insightful list all the same. Kudos.

  13. I don’t know what a bonnet comet is but I want it explained and then I’m probably going to try in for my next RP experience 😀

  14. Kinky Amish, no wonder they love staying indoors

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