10. Bloggers: Ugh. We all think we’re funny, or smart or interesting. Sometimes we are and often times we’re not.This doesn’t apply to me of course, and you guys are all great, really. Shhh…it’s the other bloggers I’m talking about.
9. Twitter snobs: “Oh, you just don’t understand Twitter.” Have you heard this? Really? Sorry, I didn’t realize that Twitter was so complicated. I thought it was just a bunch of dolts making jokes. How could I have been so wrong? So far I haven’t heard of anyone on Twitter curing cancer or splitting the atom. I love my Twitter, but some people think they’re worthy of deity status because of how many followers they have or how many retweets they’ve gotten. Being popular on Twitter is about as impressive as being popular in prison.
8. Pinterest: Holy crap! I seriously do not care that you pinned a new recipe on your board. What the hell? Why couldn’t you just stick it on Facebook? That’s where all the old people are anyway.
7. Facebook winners: These people think Facebook is a contest to see who has the most fabulous life. If your life is that great why don’t you go live it instead of spending all your time on Facebook?
6. Facebook whiners: Look, sharing some personal stuff is fine. It’s what bonds us together sometimes. But all the time? Hello, boundaries! Guess what? We’re not all here to be your therapist and this isn’t group therapy. Suck it up and pay a professional.
5. The selfie: Truth be told, I’ve taken a few selfies in my time, but in general you just look desperate for attention.
4. Social media insecurity: Do I have enough followers? Did I get enough likes and comments? I don’t remember, how did we measure our self-worth before social media? That’s right, we didn’t. We just lived our lives and tried to buy a better car than our friends.
3. Time: We all had more of it before social media. Before social media, man went to the moon and found a cure for polio. What have we done since social media? Mostly stupid stuff like drones delivering pizza and inventing the selfie. Seriously though, how cool would a selfie on the moon be? You could have the Earth over your shoulder…Neil Armstrong was a moron for missing that opportunity. He’d probably be more remembered for inventing the selfie.
2. I have to network on LinkedIn: Up until about 5 years ago I had my job, I did it and if I didn’t like it I sent a resume’ somewhere. Now it’s all about networking! Who do you know? Where do you know them from? Who am I connected with? Who are my friends connected with? Who will endorse me? Jeez, work has become work outside of work.
1. Somebody said something mean about…my blog post, my Facebook update, my picture, my political opinion that I voiced, blah, blah, blah, wah, wah, wah. Everyone has an opinion and now they get to broadcast it. There’s people I used to like in real life, and then I became privy to their opinions on everything through social media.
What are your pet peeves about social media?
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