Category Archives: Top Ten

Top Ten Tuesday! Ten Reasons Cats Are Better Than Dogs

Last week I gave dogs and the dog people their due in the worlds oldest debate.  This week it’s the cats turn. Don’t worry, I have no plans to continue comparing animals.

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10. Cattitude: You’ve got to respect their aloofness. They’re not all needy like dogs. If you’re gone 5 minutes, a dog acts like you’ve returned from the Bataan Death March while your cat just checks his watch and goes back to sleep.

9. Pooping indoors: When it’s cold and snowy and my dog has got to go at 6 a.m. I have to take her out. My cat on the other hand is even more stealthy about his bowel movements than I am. Cats are the ultimate Poop at Home People.  Some cats can even poop on a toilet.

8.  Cats are never sick: My cat has been to the vet two times in three years. My dog? Dogs get ear infections as often as an 8 year old at summer camp.

7. Toonces: I don’t recall any Saturday Night Live skits about dogs, do you?

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6. Cats are natural ghost hunters: If there’s a ghost in your house cats will always spot them and either run away or follow the invisible-to-you spectre.  Dogs don’t have that kind of attention span, leaving you completely vulnerable to ghost attacks. (Thank you to Rene of Mind Chatter for that one)

5. Cats poop in a box: With dogs it could be anywhere in your yard and you have to find it like you’re in a disgusting Easter egg hunt.

4. Has anyone ever made a Broadway play called Dogs?

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3. Cats will run around the house at full speed at 3 a.m. just to make sure you’re not sleeping too soundly.

2. Cats will ignore you until you’re ready to go to work or out to dinner; then they’ll rub against to you ensure that your clothes look like you rolled around in a fur factory. That’s how they say I love you.

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1. Cats are realists: If your plane goes down in the Andes mountains, your dog will either run down the mountain trying to find help, only to ultimately die of frostbite, or it will cuddle with you to leech away your body warmth so it could survive. A cat in that situation would start eating you before you were even dead.

That funny cat in the last picture looking like he’s surrendering to the authorities is my cat Brady. I’ve got a cat and dog, so I love both for different reasons and their interactions are always fun to watch. If you can think or any other funny reasons cats or dogs are better than the other feel free to add in the comments. Have a great Tuesday! ~ Phil

Top Ten Tuesday! Ten Reasons Dogs Are Better Than Cats

10. Dogs always warn you when there’s a house fire.

9. According to Cruella Deville, they make excellent coats.

8. Dogs are too stupid to lie.

8. The Grinch had a dog. (Who knows his name?)

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7. Dogs often solve mysteries (see Doo, Scooby)

6. Dogs are capable of making noises you can hear more than three feet away.

5. When Timmy falls down a well dogs will always tell you.  Remember Baby Jessica? Yup, dog told them where she was.  (I hope she reads this. Hi Jessica!)

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4. Brian Griffin (R.I.P.) fom Family Guy, funniest cartoon character ever, is a dog.

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3. Dogs always act like whatever you’re saying is really interesting. Cats won’t even feign a little interest.

2. Dogs will always clean up food you drop on the floor. In fact, my dog is officially my housekeeper.

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1. If my dog hadn’t followed me up to my writing room, like she does every night, I would still be trying to figure out my Top Ten list for today.

If you have any more reasons why dogs are better than cats feel free to share in the comments. Cat people, you get your day next week. Have a great Tuesday! ~Phil

Top Ten Tuesday! The Ten Best Movie Sequels Ever

With the recent debut of Guardians of the Galaxy vol. II and the return of the Alien movie franchise in ten days, I thought I’d explore sequels. Personally, I rarely like sequels. If you disagree with my list of the best sequels, please feel free to add your opinion in the comments, but if you want to add one to the list, say which one you’d take off the list.

10. Men in Black III: For the rest of this list I averaged the rankings of several websites and surveys, but this choice was all mine. If you enjoyed the first Men in Black movie, watch part two and then this one, MIB3. The last chapter in the trilogy ties everything together brilliantly with heart and humor.

9. Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan: Like I said, from here on this list is an average from several sites. I don’t see this one ranking as an all timer. Sure, who doesn’t love Ricardo Montalban and seeing Spock buy the farm? But a top ten sequel? And seriously, how old were the people that ranked this movie this high?

8. The Lord of The Rings: The Two Towers: I think the series as a whole should rank right up there on the list of all movie franchises. Honestly, they all blur together in my head and I can’t remember anything specific from any one of them. If the world says this was the best one, I’ll buy it.

7. The Dark Knight: Propelled by Heath Ledger’s brilliantly creepy Joker this film stands out as the best of the series.

6. Silence of The Lambs: Few people realize that this suspense/thriller is actually a sequel to 1986’s Manhunter that featured another detective on the trail of Hannibal Lecter.

5. Terminator 2: Judgement Day: I saw this. It was a good sequel, but I don’t know if it was top 5 all time. What do you think?

4. Aliens: Number two in the Alien series back when Sigourney Weaver was still kicking Alien ass.

3. Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back: In the first movie Princess Leia kisses her brother. This movie she kisses Han Solo. She was kind of an intergalactic slut don’t you think? Still everyone loves this because Luke got his hand cut off.

2. Toy Story 2: As good as the first, but for my money, I’d include Toy Story 3 in place of this. It’s hilarious.

1. The Godfather Part II: To be honest, I’ve never watched a Godfather movie from start to finish. I’m just not into blood and murder. I’m more of a comedy kind of guy. I do however know all the classic lines.

So, what movies would you put in your top ten sequels list, and which ones on this list would you take out?

Have a great Tuesday! ~Phil

Top Ten Tuesday! The Top Ten Psychic Pick Up Lines

Psychics are people too. When they’re not reading minds, predicting the future or communicating with the spirit of your Great Aunt Maude, they’re out there looking for love just like the rest of us. I imagine though that their special skills allow them to try a much different approach when meeting someone. Here are the Top Ten Psychic Pickup Lines:

10. I know your future and it’s me.

9. You’re fine. How am I?

8. Let me read your palm. No, not on the table.

7. I’ve been in touch with your great, great grandmother and she wants you to date me.

6. It’s not you, it’s me. Don’t worry, this will make sense in about 6 months.

5. I see a tremendous amount of pleasure in your future.

4. Don’t talk to that guy. He’ll only lead to heartbreak. I on the other hand…

3. I already know what you like

2. Do you have a dog? You do? I’m a pet psychic. Take me to your apartment immediately.

1. Why yes, I do have crystal balls.

Have a great Tuesday! I know you will. ~Phil

Top Ten Tuesday! The Ten Dumbest Fads of the Last 20 Years

This list is all my ideas. If you can think of some that I’ve forgotten, please feel free to share in the comments. If I get enough, I’ll make another list and credit the contributors.

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10. Virtual Pets: Remember these stupid things? You had to fake feed and fake care for a little digital animal. Those were popular for a summer, but every kid had one. Anybody’s pet still alive?

9. The man bun: Not once has anyone ever said, “Check out the awesome man bun on him. ”

8. Occupy… Wall Street, Washington, London etc. Remember this thing from about 10 years ago? A bunch of people with nothing better to do just walked down to a random city square and camped out there for a couple months. No one is sure what they were protesting or when it ended. Everyone just wandered off and lost interest.

7. The Macarena: Catchy song, stupid dance. I can proudly say that I’ve never once attempted it.

6. Planking: I’m referring not to the exercise for your abs, but the idiotic fad where idiots would lay somewhere like they were a board. Not funny, ever.

5. Flash Mobs: So wait, you want me to spend my free time learning a dance so me and 50 other people can surprise your friend? Yeah, I’ll get right on that.

4. The Mannequin Challenge: I’m not sure what the challenge was, except resisting the urge to punch friends or co-workers who want you to take a hilarious picture of them pretending they’re frozen.

3. E-readers: I love my Amazon Kindle more than anyone. In fact, I haven’t read a physical book in over 9 years, but I have to admit I was wrong. I really believed that actual books made from trees would be a thing of the past by now.

2. Dabbing: I’m sure that scene is why Hillary lost the election. I’m not sure why pretending to sneeze into your elbow became a fad.

1. YOLO: Yeah, thanks Drake. Funny story about Yolo. Until the other day I had never said Yolo, then I was forced to. I was on the phone with a customer service rep. You know how when they read you a series of numbers and letters they’ll say something like, “So that number is 3, 2, Z as in Zebra, C as in Cat, then 8-1-9. Is that correct?” On my call I had to read him the serial number. And there was a letter Y in the sequence and not knowing their idiotic code, the only thing I could think of for Y was Yolo, so I said it, and he laughed.

Can you think of any other fads from the last 20 years that deserve inclusion on this list? Have a great Tuesday! ~Phil

 

Top Ten Tuesday! The Ten Most Famous People in the World!

The list is from CuriosityHuman.com, the commentary for each is mine. CuriosityHuman did not specify if the list is in any specific order, so I’ll make my own.

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10. Tom Hardy, actor: I knew the name but couldn’t tell you a single movie he’s been in. It turns out that he’s been in a lot of good ones. He’s not nearly as famous as his brothers Ed, Frank, and Joe. If anybody gets that joke, please say so in the comments.

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9. Narenda Modi, Prime Minister of India: I have to admit I’ve never heard of this guy, but if he’s the boss of a country of 1.25 billion people and 4.5 billion technology customer service call centers, he’s pretty damn influential.

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8. Angela Merkel, Supermodel: A couple of my smarter readers, both of them, will recognize the supermodel joke. Angela Merkel is a German politician. My only guess for her being rated this famous is that she must be the one that knocked down the Berlin Wall. I always thought it was David Hasselhoff who did it.

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7. Larry Page & Sergey Brinn: Bueller? Bueller? Yeah, off the top of my head the names are familiar, but I wouldn’t automatically shout out Google founders! Hey Larry and Sergey, let me ask you this: How in the hell does a magician from Rancho Cucamonga who calls himself Phil Factor rank higher in a Google search for ‘The Phil Factor’ than my blog, which is called The Phil Factor? I get a couple thousand page views a week! You can’t tell me that there are a more people each week looking for a magician named Phil? Take that and stick it in your algorithm. Yes, I realize that by hyperlinking to Google, the magicians site and my site that I’ve created an infinite improbability loop that will shut down the internet if anyone clicks all three links.

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6. Ryan Reynolds: Good looking actor, never done much of note until last years Deadpool. But, 19 years ago I watched a little know sitcom that only lasted three years called Two Guys, A Girl, and a Pizza Place, and I pegged Ryan Reynolds as a future star. That show was hilarious. Go back and find it.

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5. Leonardo DeCaprio: A great actor. Certainly deserving of his place on this list. If I had a choice of five people I could switch places with, he might be on the list just because of this GIF.

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4. Adele: If you’re known by one name, you’re doing pretty damn good in your life, or you’re infamous for something evil. Until Adele goes on a killing spree, she is doing pretty damn good in her life. Ten years ago we had no idea who she was and now she’s top ten famous? Then again, ten years ago you had no idea who I was and now you’re reading my blog! I guess I’m not doing too bad either.

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3. Hillary Clinton: Had she won the Presidency she’d be number one on the list, but unfortunately, she is likely to be an interesting footnote in future history books.

2. Justin Bieber: He’s really famous alright, but would he be as famous if he weren’t such an asshat? I doubt it. Last week my friend Suzie wrote a post titled: Things I’ve Learned in Four Years of Blogging. She said that she got harassed in her comments by some middle-aged house frau’s that were sticking up for The Biebs. Well ladies, if you love that moron so much, bring it on. Feel free to fill my comments section with your sad, misguided hatred (of your own life).

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1. Donald Trump: Notice that the top two are both loved and hated, while the people that are universally loved don’t rank as high? Being hated may be more of a fame maker than being universally liked.

So, if you made a list, who would you add to this and who would you remove? If you’re from another country, would this list be different for you? Comments! Comments please! Have a great Tuesday! ~ Phil

Top Ten Tuesday! The Ten Most Popular Phil Factors Ever!

Get ready to laugh. To celebrate my blogs 12th birthday I’m listing the top ten posts, by number of views, from the last 12 years. If you’re new to #ThePhilFactor you’ve got some catching up to do. The titles are all live links, so feel free to click away!

10. Zombie Love BoatThis is an underrated favorite of mine.

9. Me and Billie Joe ArmstrongConsidering that this one is from two weeks ago, it’s amazing that it’s got enough view to crack the top ten.

8. 2016 Predictions From A Legit Psychic

7. Liar, Liar, Pants on Fire: The Interview with Magician James David

6. The Rolling Stones Are Liars: My Class ReunionThis one is more nostalgia than humor.

5. The Ten Most Painful Things That Have Ever Happened To MeApparently people like to learn about pain. Lots of random Google searches regularly bring readers for this one.

4. Three Things… I’m still puzzled about why this gets a steady stream of views.

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3. Real Sexting Conversations to Read In HindiHindi speaking people really like to use their cell phones.

2. Meet The Author: Christopher Moore (yes, that Christopher Moore) The man has a very loyal following. You should read his books.

1. Twitter People vs. Facebook PeopleThis one surprised me. I knew it was funny when I wrote it, so I shared it to Reddit and it went a little viral, getting 17,000 views in one day and standing atop the Reddit humor category for over 24 hours. That was fun. I haven’t had anything close to that since. 

Have a great Tuesday! ~Phil