Tag Archives: ThePhil Factor

What I Did In The Haunted Library

Posted on June 15, 2023 | 5 comments

 

As you can see from the pictures, the Ray P. Flower Library in Watertown, New York is a beautiful library inside and out. The library opened in 1905. The funds for the library were donated by Emma Flower Taylor in 1903 as a memorial to her father. Another girl with Daddy issues, am I right? Maybe that explains why these statues are there. Still trying to get daddy’s attention even in the after-life? Emma, when will you ever learn? 

 

I’m here tonight writing this from within the library. (The call is coming from inside the house! Who remembers that line from the movie When a Stranger Calls?)

The ghost of Emma has been spotted by both librarians and others visiting the library. Also, many have reported blood-curdling screams in the basement.  If there wasn’t a security guard and other people here I’d do a whole Blair Witch thing for you right now.

I am sitting in the room in the library that is dedicated to Emma Flower Taylor. My parents were both from this area and I share a surname with Miss Emma Flower Taylor. Could we be related? I have no idea, but it seems likely. 

I spent about 90 minutes hanging around this spectacular library. Sometimes I’d sit in one room or area for a bit and at other times I meandered through the halls and stairwells. Unfortunately, I couldn’t go to the basement. It was roped off.

I even spoke aloud to Emma when no one was around. Nothing. Hoping to provoke a response from her ghost I even did a cartwheel when no one was looking.

Between my cartwheel and my salt & pepper hair, I don’t know how a ghost with daddy issues could ignore me! 

If you’d like to hear some first-person accounts, here’s a video with some of the library staff discussing their experiences with Emma. 

Have a great Thursday, and thanks for reading! ~Phil

 

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Dear President Obama

Posted on March 23, 2013 | 4 comments

This is my open letter to you, President Obama, and yes, I know you’ll hear about this because Michelle subscribes to The Phil Factor on her Amazon Kindle  to read while she’s home alone when you’re on those “business trips.”

Look Barack, I’m glad you’re a sports fan. Good for you. You’re a regular guy just like the rest of us. What I’m not o.k. with is you going on ESPN every year to fill out your NCAA March Madness bracket. I’m not saying you can’t do one. Just don’t go on t.v. for 30 minutes to fill it out. 1) I don’t care about your picks unless you’re actually in the same office pool as me, and 2) IT’S NOT WHAT WE’RE PAYING YOU TO DO!!!

Here’s the deal: my taxes pay your salary, ergo, that makes me and every American your boss. Guess what? Wherever I’ve ever worked they frown on employees wasting time gambling. We usually hide the hours we spend researching our brackets from the boss. We don’t invite the boss to play, so that we can pretend we didn’t waste half the week filling out our brackets and collecting money from everyone. The boss knows we do it, but he or she also likes to pretend that their employees aren’t spending most of a week screwing off. But you, you don’t even pretend you’re working! You bring in Stuart Scott and set up a giant white board in your office and spend half a day explaining why Cals pick and roll has a real chance to give the Syracuse 2-3 zone fits in the 2nd round. Guess what Barack? I don’t care how much you know about basketball.

You know what I’d be really impressed with is if you pulled out a white board during your State of The Union address and showed a bracket full of evil dictators and communist countries that the U.S. is going to defeat.  If the whole world was hunky dory and we weren’t involved in any wars or recessions or gas prices were reasonable, sure, go ahead, take a breather and relax! It’s like as a kid, when your chores are done you can go out and play. But for the money you’re making I wanna see my President at work 24/7.

Just for being President for two terms you’re set for life financially and you get free lifetime security. That’s a pretty sweet deal. As part of that deal I kind of would like it if you didn’t treat that job like your own personal fantasy camp.  Since you took office there’s been more jocks in the White House than the Lambeau field locker room. Did I mention that me and everyone else are paying for that with our taxes? Yeah, now get back to work.

I’m not saying you can’t do an office pool with the cabinet. Remember when I said that the rest of us hide it from the boss when we waste work time on petty gambling? It’s when you get cocky and flaunt it in front of the boss that you get in trouble.  Here, if you’re so fond of petty gambling on the job, how about this: my NCAA bracket versus yours. You win, you get to stay President. I win, I get your job.   F3NQRYD6TB4J

If you’d like to support my NCAA tournament bracket you can check out my humorous murder mystery novel White Picket Prisons  on all the finest e-retailers. As always, if you like what you read here please hit the Facebook Like or Share buttons.

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Dave Coulier?!!?

Posted on April 6, 2005 | Leave a comment

Does everyone remember that Alanis Morrissette song from a few years back where she’s really pissed about her boyfriend breaking up with her and getting a new girlfriend really quick? Everyone’s first thought upon hearing that song had to be, “This is the angriest, most bitter woman I’ve ever heard.” I just recently found out that the subject of her intense hatred in that song was Dave Coulier. If you just said, “Who’s Dave Coulier?” Let me remind you. Remember the sitcom from the early 1990’s, Full House? Now you’re remembering, right? Dave Coulier was the dorky, blonde, comedian who did cartoon character voices. Alanis, come on! You’ve got to be kidding me! You’re upset about losing that guy?!!? Those weren’t even original cartoon character voices he did. He was copying voices other people did. That’s not a real comedian, that’s the annoying kid in the lunch room in junior high. Apparently in Canada where Dave and Alanis are from he must be some sort of national hero, because I just don’t get why Alanis would mourn the loss of that guy. I mean really, over the last 10 years, how many of us have thought to ourselves, Gosh, I wish Dave Coulier was on TV more often”? I can see being upset over Bob Saget breaking up with you, but not Dave Coulier. And don’t even get me started on Uncle Jesse.

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