Tag Archives: blogging

Annual Bloggers Bash Awards Voting: This Is Very Important!

The voting for the Annual Bloggers Bash Awards is now open! I’m honored and touched that someone nominated me for Funniest Blogger. Now that I’m nominated, I’d really like to win it to help my 2018 goals of also winning Sexiest Man Alive. I want one of the two, but only you can help me in this on. When you click the link that I’ll provide, I’d appreciate it tremendously if you go to the Funniest Blogger category and scroll down the category, and click on The Phil Factor. Click HERE to vote!

Thank you for your support! ~Phil

Throwback Thursdays! I’m Freshly Pissed!

This was wildly popular when I published it two years ago. If you didn’t see it then, it’s new to you!

This blog is dedicated to myself and all the other erstwhile bloggers who have toiled long and hard writing interesting and engaging blog posts but have nary an official award to show for it.

IMG_20140614_090421_411-1

For my friends who visit me here from Facebook or TwitterFreshly Pressed is an honor awarded to people who aren’t as brilliant and funny as I am a blog post by the trolls people that ‘run’ WordPress like their own cool kids clique in high school. The honor of having your post Freshly Pressed means that it is part of a featured list on WordPress that is read by thousands and you get a Freshly Pressed badge that you can post in your sidebar for all eternity so you can lord it over the have nots, telling them  “I’m better than you”.

You know how the government has the “Do Not Fly” list? I’m pretty sure that WordPress has a “Do Not Press” list and if I wasn’t on it before I’m pretty sure I just got moved to the top of that list. Is it just me or are a lot of you sick and tired of reading blogs that begin with ‘I was on WordPress two weeks when my post was Freshly Pressed,” or “I’ve been Freshly Pressed three times.”  Well la-de da, aren’t you special?

Lest you think this is just sour grapes from an envious non-award winner, I once had a post that I shared on Reddit that got over 16,000 views in a day and spent over 24 hours ranked #1 in the Humor category. How can the Freshly Pressed overlords say something that gets that kind of reaction isn’t good enough?

I’m sure that this weekend the Freshly Pressed feed will be filled with hundreds of touching stories about great fathers.  Well la-de-da, aren’t you special? What if you never got your father’s or WordPress’s approval?  I’m creating a new award for all of us who have created  great posts that are creative, thought-provoking, funny, and original, and have never received the Freshly Pressed award that we so obviously deserve. My, nay, OUR award is the Freshly Pissed award. You can award it to yourself or another blogger who has never been Freshly Pressed but who obviously deserves it.

Just steal the picture at the top of this post and put it on your blog or send it to a fellow blogger you think deserves recognition. That’s right. I created that original, but unlike the tyrannical aristocracy of Freshly Pressed who hand out their precious awards as if they’re giving away Nobel Prizes, I want everyone to have it if they want.  (You know who else is going to be Freshly Pissed? My wife when she sees that I got permanent marker on a coffee mug making the picture)

If you can put it in your sidebar, great. I wish I knew how. If you do award yourself or others, let me know in the comments and I’ll compile the Freshly Pissed  list and post it on my blog later this week so that all of us who are Freshly Pissed can visit each other.  Keep in mind though that if you ever do win a Freshly Pressed you are out of the club. No soup for you!

If you like the idea please share by re-blogging. Have a great Saturday! ~Phil

Happy 11th Birthday to The Oldest Blog in the World!

birthday

To be honest, I don’t know if I have the oldest blog in the world, but until someone else can prove that theirs has been around longer, I’m going to assume it’s me. I’m not usually a pat me on the back, “look at me, look at me” kind of person, but c’mon, it’s my blogs 11th birthday! Indulge me a little. I think 11 blog years is like 110 in people years.

Some who have doubted my claim as the longest running blog in the world have asked me, “If your blog has been running for 11 years, why don’t you have more followers?” Fair point. Here’s my story: I started blogging in January of 2005. I wrote a fantasy sports blog. That one ran for about 3 months until two things happened. The first was that I got hired by a fantasy sports website to write for them. The other thing that happened caused the birth of The Phil Factor.

I was hanging around the office of my day job being a smart ass about something (I know, hard to believe, right?) when a secretary named Erin said to me, “That’s pretty funny. You should blog about that.” So I did, but the first Phil Factor was on Blogger. I blogged on Blogger for 6 years. Then I went to a blogging platform called Posterous, which was one of the first to allow you to share your blog posts to Facebook, Twitter, and other places with just a click of the mouse. After two years on Posterous, the blogging website closed, and that was why in the Spring of 2013  I moved here to WordPress and met all of you wonderful people.

If you want to read it, here’s the link to  the first Phil Factor post ever from April 2, 2005. I made fun of American Idol, which was in year four then. It’s now wrapping up it’s 15th and final season. I’ve blogged through two American Presidents and three Popes. One of my first posts was about Pope John Paul II passing away and my desire to be elected next Pope. My blog began before the show How I Met Your Mother came on the air. In September 2005 when Barney Stinson said, “This is SO going on my blog!” I was thrilled that my odd little hobby had been validated. Here is a picture from my old Blogger site proving that I’ve been blogging since April 2, 2005: (Scroll all the way down to the bottom of the pic to see that I posted 134 times in 2005)

IMG_0823

Yes, I was a little light on the posts in 2010. I was kind of busy. Also, some posts have been deleted for various reasons, including that some were included in my book 50 Shades of Phil, which includes the best fifty posts from my first eight years of blogging. If you have a Kindle, Nook, or just a Kindle app on your device, that e-book is the best 99 cents you’ll ever spend. Funny 500-600 word essays are perfect for passing the time when you’re in a doctor’s waiting room, on the subway, or on the porcelain throne.

Here’s another interesting Phil Factor fact: In 2011 The Phil Factor was also hosted on the website of Perky Jerky under the title of The Sarcastic Jerk. I should have stuck with them. A fun company and their beef and turkey jerky is delicious. They sent me a box full of it.

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it. Sorry about the self-indulgent post. I’ll return to my usualy idiocy in future posts. Have a great weekend! ~Phil

Top Ten Blogging Pet Peeves

Picture credit: someecards.com

Picture credit: someecards.com

Hi. My name is Phil and I’m a blogger.  (Everyone else in the “blogosphere” replies “Hi Phil!”)  Yes, if I’m being painfully honest with myself, I’m a blogger. I’ve been a blogger for over nine years. I took to it like a fish to water. Just because I do it doesn’t mean that I love everything about it.  Thank you to Nerd in The Brain  for the idea for today’s Top Ten list. Go visit her. She has a great blog. Without further adieu, here are my Top Ten Peeves about blogging:

10. Blog Awards: Let’s get this one right out of the way now. It’s not an award if it requires you to do anything you normally wouldn’t,  like turn around and give it to fifteen other people.  There’s no other awards in life that require you to do work. “And the Oscar for Best Actress in a Drama goes to Meryl Streep, but only if she can name fifteen other actors that deserve it!”

9.  Everything has a blog: Have you noticed that just about everything on TV claims it has a blog? Products in commercials have blogs. New programs have blogs. Every celebrity has a “blog.” Blogs aren’t blogs if a marketing department creates them and manages them.

8. Everyone can have a blog: Yeah, I know that’s kind of the point, but there’s got to be some sort of screening process.  Just because you can say something doesn’t mean that you should.

7.  Blogs that are too long: Yup, I’m well aware that we all have unique  life stories, and I want to hear yours, but not if I have to clear my plans for the evening to read your blog post. I want to hear your life story in bite sized pieces. Think of blogging like a party you go to.  Nobody likes the person who traps you in the corner near the bathroom to tell you everything about their life. In the blogosphere I like to move about the party meeting many new and interesting people.

6. Blogging terms: Blogosphere, blogiversary, blogiverse, re-blog. Are any of these real words? Are they in a real dictionary somewhere? I feel like an idiot using them, but I have to because everyone here understands them.

5. Blogs without pictures: Words are good, but c’mon, brighten that up with a little eye candy! That’s why I have that picture of me at the top left. You’re welcome.

4. Fake profile pictures: Unless you’re blogging about something super personal or “adult” why hide your identity? How am I going to stalk you in real life if I can’t recognize you?

3. Blogs about boring stuff: Hate those.Please stop writing them. No,  not you. Don’t you hate when someone boring follows you and comments on all your posts and so you feel obligated to visit and comment on their blog occasionally, but it is just the worst blog ever? Thank God this doesn’t apply to anyone I follow. You guys and gals are great as chips.

2. Blogs that don’t post their own thoughts: An inspirational picture or quote is nice now and then, but if that’s all a blog is, what’s the fun in that? I like to read little, genuine slices of people’s lives. I don’t care what Ghandi said fifty years ago. If I did I’d read his blog. Speaking of that, he hasn’t posted in a while. What’s up with that?

1.  Animated GIF’s: You know the ones, right? It’s literally a two second video clip that repeats endlessly. It’s nearly seizure inducing like a strobe light. Nothing is that funny in two seconds.

As always, everything here is meant  in good humor with no malice intended. In the comments, what are your blogging pet peeves?

As always, if you enjoy #ThePhilFactor feel free to share by Facebook, Twitter, or re-blogging! Have a great Tuesday! ~Phil

TBT! I’m Freshly Pissed!

(Published on June 14, 2014, this was and still is one of my most popular posts ever. Please feel free to re-blog and keep the vitriol going.)

This blog is dedicated to myself and all the other erstwhile bloggers who have toiled long and hard writing interesting and engaging blog posts but have nary an official award to show for it.

IMG_20140614_090421_411-1

For my friends who visit me here from Facebook or TwitterFreshly Pressed is an honor awarded to people who aren’t as brilliant and funny as I am a blog post by the trolls people that ‘run’ WordPress like their own cool kids clique in high school. The honor of having your post Freshly Pressed means that it is part of a featured list on WordPress that is read by thousands and you get a Freshly Pressed badge that you can post in your sidebar for all eternity so you can lord it over the have nots, telling them  “I’m better than you”.

You know how the government has the “Do Not Fly” list? I’m pretty sure that WordPress has a “Do Not Press” list and if I wasn’t on it before I’m pretty sure I just got moved to the top of that list. Is it just me or are a lot of you sick and tired of reading blogs that begin with ‘I was on WordPress two weeks when my post was Freshly Pressed,” or “I’ve been Freshly Pressed three times.”  Well la-de da, aren’t you special?

Lest you think this is just sour grapes from an envious non-award winner, I once had a post that I shared on Reddit that got over 16,000 views in a day and spent over 24 hours ranked #1 in the Humor category. How can the Freshly Pressed overlords say something that gets that kind of reaction isn’t good enough?

I’m sure that this Father’s Day weekend the Freshly Pressed feed will be filled with hundreds of touching stories about great fathers.  Well la-de-da, aren’t you special? What if you never got your father’s or WordPress’s approval?  I’m creating a new award for all of us who have created  great posts that are creative, thought-provoking, funny, and original, and have never received the Freshly Pressed award that we so obviously deserve. My, nay, OUR award is the Freshly Pissed award. You can award it to yourself or another blogger who has never been Freshly Pressed but who obviously deserves it.

Just steal the picture at the top of this post and put it on your blog or send it to a fellow blogger you think deserves recognition. That’s right. I created that original, but unlike the tyrannical aristocracy of Freshly Pressed who hand out their precious awards as if they’re giving away Nobel Prizes, I want everyone to have it if they want.  (You know who else is going to be Freshly Pissed? My wife when she sees that I got permanent marker on a coffee mug making the picture)

If you can put it in your sidebar, great. I wish I knew how. If you do award yourself or others, let me know in the comments and I’ll compile the Freshly Pissed  list and post it on my blog later this week so that all of us who are Freshly Pissed can visit each other.  Keep in mind though that if you ever do win a Freshly Pressed you are out of the club. No soup for you!

If you like the idea please share by re-blogging. Have a great Saturday! ~Phil

Top Ten Tuesdays! My Top Ten Blogging Pet Peeves

Picture credit: someecards.com

Picture credit: someecards.com

Hi. My name is Phil and I’m a blogger.  (Everyone else in the “blogosphere” replies “Hi Phil!”)  Yes, if I’m being painfully honest with myself, I’m a blogger. I’ve been a blogger for over nine years. I took to it like a fish to water. Just because I do it doesn’t mean that I love everything about it.  Thank you to Nerd in The Brain  for the idea for today’s Top Ten list. Go visit her. She has a great blog. Without further adieu, here are my Top Ten Peeves about blogging:

10. Blog Awards: Let’s get this one right out of the way now. It’s not an award if it requires you to do anything you normally wouldn’t,  like turn around and give it to fifteen other people.  There’s no other awards in life that require you to do work. “And the Oscar for Best Actress in a Drama goes to Meryl Streep, but only if she can name fifteen other actors that deserve it!”

9.  Everything has a blog: Have you noticed that just about everything on TV claims it has a blog? Products in commercials have blogs. New programs have blogs. Every celebrity has a “blog.” Blogs aren’t blogs if a marketing department creates them and manages them.

8. Everyone can have a blog: Yeah, I know that’s kind of the point, but there’s got to be some sort of screening process.  Just because you can say something doesn’t mean that you should.

7.  Blogs that are too long: Yup, I’m well aware that we all have unique  life stories, and I want to hear yours, but not if I have to clear my plans for the evening to read your blog post. I want to hear your life story in bite sized pieces. Think of blogging like a party you go to.  Nobody likes the person who traps you in the corner near the bathroom to tell you everything about their life. In the blogosphere I like to move about the party meeting many new and interesting people.

6. Blogging terms: Blogosphere, blogiversary, blogiverse, re-blog. Are any of these real words? Are they in a real dictionary somewhere? I feel like an idiot using them, but I have to because everyone here understands them.

5. Blogs without pictures: Words are good, but c’mon, brighten that up with a little eye candy! That’s why I have that picture of me at the top left. You’re welcome.

4. Fake profile pictures: Unless you’re blogging about something super personal or “adult” why hide your identity? How am I going to stalk you in real life if I can’t recognize you?

3. Blogs about boring stuff: Hate those.Please stop writing them. No,  not you. Don’t you hate when someone boring follows you and comments on all your posts and so you feel obligated to visit and comment on their blog occasionally, but it is just the worst blog ever? Thank God this doesn’t apply to anyone I follow. You guys and gals are great as chips.

2. Blogs that don’t post their own thoughts: An inspirational picture or quote is nice now and then, but if that’s all a blog is, what’s the fun in that? I like to read little, genuine slices of people’s lives. I don’t care what Ghandi said fifty years ago. If I did I’d read his blog. Speaking of that, he hasn’t posted in a while. What’s up with that?

1.  Animated GIF’s: You know the ones, right? It’s literally a two second video clip that repeats endlessly. It’s nearly seizure inducing like a strobe light. Nothing is that funny in two seconds.

As always, everything here is meant  in good humor with no malice intended. In the comments, what are your blogging pet peeves?

As always, if you enjoy #ThePhilFactor feel free to share by Facebook, Twitter, or re-blogging! Have a great Tuesday! ~Phil