Tag Archives: Fun with Search Terms

Fun With Search Terms: The Father’s Day Edition!

Posted on June 17, 2018 | 3 comments

When most of us were kids, Google was our dad. There was no internet or search engines. If you wanted to know something you had two choices: break open that giant set of encyclopedias that your parents bought twenty years ago or ask your dad. Dad was supposed to know everything, right? Only now that we’re parents we know that our parents didn’t know everything and were making all their answers up.

Now though, we can search the internet for answers. Unfortunately, when you ask the internet questions,  sometimes the internet keeps those questions so a blogger can make fun of them later, like now. Today. That is what I’m doing. Here are the funniest/weirdest search terms that brought readers to #ThePhilFactor over the last three months:

Gary Spivey on Trump Impeachment: I will take any opportunity to post a picture of Gary Spivey, Psychic Medium because I’m jealous of his fame and fortune. And hair. We have a lot in common. We have great hair and both he and I have predicted a premature end to the term of he who shall not be named. Also, I predicted I would interview Gary for The Phil Factor this year. He knows it’s going to happen.

MTV music video font: From my old days working on MTV I stole their font and have been using it.

Philthy Animal Old: I take exception to Google deciding that my blog, or me in particular, is the answer to this search term. It’s like Google is mocking me personally.

Funeral Fun: That’s right! Need entertainment for your funeral? Just call 1-800-Phil-Factor! I will emcee with humor and empathy!

“phil factor” bill gates: Yes, I’m the Bill Gates of blogging.

Phil is leaving memes: You’re damn right I’m leaving memes. I’m a meme dropping machine. And I’m sassy.

real sexting conversations to read in hindi: This goes back to a post from 2015 and since I published that, the views and this search term haven’t stopped. EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. That’s ok. You Hindi speaking people feel free to fly your freak flag at The Phil Factor anytime you want. I’m here for you.

Have a great Sunday and Happy Father’s Day to all the Dads out there! ~Phil

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Posted in Humor, Uncategorized

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No Hush Money? Then It’s Fun With Search Terms!

Posted on March 10, 2018 | 37 comments

Fortunately Donald Trump hasn’t paid me money to keep my mouth shut, so I’m going to publish this. Fun with Search Terms is my quarterly post reminding you that whatever crazy thing you use Google to search for, someone somewhere is reading it. These are the ten best, funniest, weirdest search terms that have brought people to #ThePhilFactor in the last three months.

10. Do sociopaths give off an oder: I don’t know if anyone gives off an oder but sociopaths might give off an odor. And I’m marketing that odor as a new Axe Body Spray: Scent of a Sociopath! Then again, all Axe body sprays smell like that, don’t they?

That’s me in the crystal ball. I’m not the lady

9. Predictions in the phil predictions predictions for 2018: I predict that the person who typed this into Google will have employment challenges for the rest of their life.

8. Real sexting conversations to read in Hindi: I don’t read or write Hindi, but many of my readers apparently do. I’m thinking that if I start a second blog about Hindi sexting it might be more popular than this one.

7. kizss feetcanada: Who doesn’t love kissing Canadian feet? Am I right?

6. butt and boobs: I only have one of these two things. Or is it three things?

5. if life was like facebook: Wow! That’s a horror movie idea if I’ve ever heard one.

4. pickup line about being psychic: In addition to my Hindi dating website, I’m now adding a dating service for psychics, but of course, they already knew that.

3. extra loud laughers: Well, I certainly hope that’s all of you. Extra loud laughing is ok to a point, isn’t it? At a certain point too much extra loud laughing verges into maniacal Joker like laughing, doesn’t it?

2. I want to kill people when they chew food: Seems like Google should reverse search this term and send the authorities to this persons house. Really? Food chewing put you over the edge? There are so many more petty reasons to hate so many people!

1. phil taylor american idol: While the title is apt, the season of the new American Idol airs tomorrow and I’m contractually bound not to say anything about the outcome. (Psst…I totally win)

So what are the funniest or weirdest search terms you’ve ever seen?

Have a great Saturday! ~Phil

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Posted in Humor, pop culture, Uncategorized

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Fun With Search Terms: The Holiday Edition

Posted on December 10, 2016 | 15 comments

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For me, the thrill of holidays and birthdays is not in the gifts I get, but the surprise. There’s nothing I love more than opening a present to find that someone has chosen something I never thought of, but I immediately love it. As a blogger, looking at our list of search terms that brought people to our blog is like that. Like Forrest Gump said, “Search terms are like a box of chocolates. You never know what you’re going to get. And The Phil Factor is the best blog ever.” That’s an exact quote from the movie. Look it up. Although the movie is 22 years old, it predicted my blog. When I saw that movie in 1994, I knew that I’d wait about ten years and start this blog. Ok, that’s not true, but what is true is this list of ridiculous things people typed into Google and as a result ended up here.

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Katy Perry Fighting: I tried to keep it out of the media, but when I turned Katy down for a date, well, I don’t want to say anything bad about her, but let’s just say that she didn’t take it well. I had to delete her spiteful comments on my blog several times.

top 10 sexiest men alive of 2016: Blah, blah, blah. Making the top ten is not what I was shooting for.

McDonald’s Vatican: Yes, Pope Francis, you’re welcome. Now you can have McNuggets every day if you want. What’s really cool is that the workers at the Vatican McDonald’s wear tiny McDonald’s Pope hats.

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horniestintheland.com: I will neither confirm nor deny if that’s true.

pumpkin spice oil change: I love it every fall when the seasonal oil flavors come out.

he is swearing at me pictures: I swear that I am not swearing at anyone and if you think I am, you should talk with your doctor to see if The Phil Factor is right for you.

Amish birthday: I always invite all the Amish to celebrate their birthday on my blog. In fact, if you see Jedediah Gruber today, wish him a happy 44th birthday!

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i want sexting: I have no idea why Google thought this person should be directed to The Phil Factor. That is not a service I provide, unless the price is right.

real sexting conversations to read in hindi full hd: मैं अपनी हिंदी पाठकों प्यार   That message is for a select few. 😉  The rest of you can move on. Nothing to see here. But if you do see it, it will be in full hd.

Tuesday theme shows: I’m sorry for all the times I wrote about Tuesday themed shows such as….umm…are there any Tuesday themed shows? Anywhere?

Psychic predictions, 2016: It’s a well established fact that I’m psychic. I know you don’t believe me, but I know that because I am psychic. See? Come back on Thursday Dec. 29 when I will review my 2016 psychic predictions to see how many I got right.

Those were just some of the best presents I found in my search terms log over the last three months. What were some of yours? Have a great weekend! ~Phil

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And You Thought Hillary Clinton’s E-Mails Might Be Bad?

Posted on March 14, 2015 | 29 comments

This is my quarterly “Fun with Search Terms” post where I highlight the stupidest search terms that brought someone to my blog. If you come from outside the blog world to read this, I’ll explain. Those of us that operate a blog get all sorts of information about things, like how many people read our blog each day, what countries they come from, how they got to us, ie from Facebook, Twitter or Google, and we get to see the idiotic search terms they typed into Google that brought them to us. Trust me Hillary, feel free to show the world your secret e-mails. They can’t be more embarrassing than what some people have searched for.

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10. Kittens in snow talking: Who is leaving their kittens outside in the snow? I am calling the SPCA. Bring those kittens inside! Of course this brought people to my blog. Aren’t I always writing about kittens?

9. First man alive: I’m not saying if I am or I’m not, but my blog has been around for ten years, so I may have been the first man blogging.

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8. High Santa on weed: Instead of milk and cookies I leave Santa pot brownies.

7. Kimberly Taylor boobs: As you may have noticed, I almost never talk about family on The Phil Factor. I will neither confirm nor deny if I am related to Kimberly Taylor or her boobs.

6. Is there an I hate Oprah website? I have been proud of many accomplishments in my life. The fact that Google decided my blog was the answer to this question supersedes all previous accomplishments.

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5. Meerkat butts: Well who doesn’t love a tight little meerkat butt? They’re so cute.

4. Things that have happened on a Tuesday: That’s right, if it happens on a Tuesday you’ll find it documented here.

3. All nude perfect skinny ass backward nice: You know how in America every Chinese restaurant is named something like Grand Super China Incredible Dragon Buffet? This search term is like that but as if someone with English as a second language was looking for a strip club. And yes, my skinny ass looks backward nice.

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2. Horniestintheland.com: Go on, put that search term into Google. I’m not daring you. I insist that you do it. Go ahead. I’ll wait. Open a tab, put in Google.com, type horniestintheland.com. The first two search results are to The Phil Factor, right? Now try this: click “images” at the top of the Google page. It’s all pictures that have been on The Phil Factor! Google has officially decided that I am HorniestInTheLand! Should I add that to my LinkedIn profile?

1. Real sexting conversations to read in hindi: In just the last 30 days alone 53 people have used this search term and found my blog. Something strange regarding sexting in Hindi happened somewhere in the world. Either that, or I’m secretly embedding Hindi sexual innuendo in my blog posts. Only my Hindi friends will really know.

There you have it. My quarterly proof that there are certain people that probably shouldn’t be allowed to vote or operate a motor vehicle. As always, if you enjoyed #ThePhilFactor please share it by hitting the Facebook, Twitter, or re-blog button below. The more times my nonsense gets shared the more ridiculous the Google search results will become. Have a great weekend! ~Phil

29 Comments

Posted in Humor, Uncategorized

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Fun with Search Terms!

Posted on March 15, 2014 | 9 comments

This is my quarterly Edward Snowden-like reminder that whenever you put a search term into Google, someone somewhere may be reading it.  Here are some of the most unique search terms that have brought people to The Phil Factor, with what I hope is humorous commentary.

1. Original drummer Motorhead:

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My secret is finally out and I’m so relieved. Yes, I was the drummer for a British heavy metal band in the 1980’s

2. Horniestintheland.com: When I do my ‘Fun with Search Terms’ post every 90 days or so this phrase always comes up at least once. I suppose Horniest in the Land is some sort of title. I wasn’t aware I entered that contest, but OK, I’ll take any recognition I can get. I’m sure it’s a website, but I’m not going there. Check for me and report back in the comments here.

3. Sad emo sith in the floor: That’s right, The Phil Factor is where all the depressed Star Wars fans go. I really hate when I leave my emo sith all over the floor. I’m constantly tripping on them. They’re worse than stepping on Legos. Pro tip for parents of small children: Don’t buy them Legos. Or emo sith.

4. to much bees massacred that man ehead only see that in canada the bees stay on head of the man only: Well obviously. Why wouldn’t this lead people to my blog?

5. Should I be scared of invisible germs? Yes. Yes you should. I sneezed on my computer while typing this blog and now you’re catching my cold.

6. where can i find the forms one needs to fill for the upcoming audition in tpf: (TPF = The Phil Factor) The forms to audition for The Phil Factor can be found on my “About Me” page, although based on your lack of capitalization when typing your search term I don’t have a good feeling about your chances.

7. the angry beavers smoking weed: I hope the weed smoking helps those beavers relax a little. Then again, if smoking pot gives you the munchies, who wants hungry beavers around?

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8. Are Phil Taylor’s children disabled? Their only disability is having me as a father.

9.  Kanye West loser jerk: I’m thrilled that my blog is the answer to this question.

10. Happy hump day sexy guy pics: Hell yeah! Did you see the picture on the top left of this page of me leaning on the car? And I’m not sexy just on hump day either.

As always, feel free to share #ThePhilFactor by Facebook, Twitter, re-blogging, or any other social media means. Have a great weekend! ~Phil

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