Tag Archives: funniest blogger The Phil Factor

Tide Pods and Condom Snorting: Generation Z is for Zombie

I’m not sure if you are aware of this, but a whole other generation has slipped into existence right under our noses and oddly, this post will end with their noses. Us grown adults are aware of the Millennials, the generation of people born from 1981 to 1997. And they are aware of themselves as well. A lot of old folks, meaning us Gen X’ers, decry the alleged shallow, self-centeredness of the Millennial generation. Notice I said alleged. That’s the stereotype. I’m not one to paint everyone with a broad brush, but there is another group, another generation that just might be trouble. Generation Z. I think the Z is for Zombie.

Generation Z is the generation of “people” born from the early to mid-90’s until the 2000’s. At the risk of sounding like the “hey you kids, get off of my lawn!” guy, I believe Generation Z might be our worst generation ever. Let’s take a look at their brief history, shall we?

This is the generation that ten years ago “invented” the oh so hilarious planking prank, where they would just lie in odd places as if they were a plank. Wow, I can just see the artistic genius in this generation, can’t you? One of these has got to be the next DaVinci don’t you think?

When they bored with planking and fidget spinners they came up with the brilliant idea to eat laundry detergent and put pictures of it on Snapchat to amuse their friends. I can imagine this conversation went on in many homes:

Son: Mom! Where are the dish detergent pods?

Mom: (silently overjoyed her son is helping around the house) They’re beneath the sink honey! (Later that day she wonders why the sink is still full of dishes but her son’s breath smells like Lavender Breeze)

Now Generation Z, yes, all of them, are snorting condoms. I may be a little old school, but I think they’re using them wrong. Didn’t their Health class teacher do that demonstration with the condom and the cucumber? It doesn’t even look fun. Are they aware of the other ways to use these things? Back in my day, all we snorted was drugs. Have these kids even tried drugs? Or sex? Cancel that last thought. I definitely don’t want to see this group of rocket scientists reproducing, which, if they used the condoms right…

I’d say this generation is a riddle wrapped in an enigma, but that would be insulting to enigmas. Generation Z is like morons wrapped in other morons.

So, on to other things…the voting for the Annual Bloggers Bash Awards is still going on and if you enjoyed this little rant I’d really appreciate your vote for me in the Funniest Blogger category. You don’t even have to be a blogger to vote. Just go HERE!

Also, on Monday, many music loving bloggers are participating in  #MusicMonday by publishing their lists of all the concerts they’ve been to so we can visit each other and discuss our favorite bands. Want to participate? Just post your list on Monday morning with #MusicMonday in the title and look for all the other #MusicMonday posts in the Reader and on Twitter, then visit and comment on each others lists! And for cripes sake, would someone please share this to StumbleUpon?

Have a great Saturday, and thanks for your vote! ~Phil

Annual Bloggers Bash Awards Voting: This Is Very Important!

The voting for the Annual Bloggers Bash Awards is now open! I’m honored and touched that someone nominated me for Funniest Blogger. Now that I’m nominated, I’d really like to win it to help my 2018 goals of also winning Sexiest Man Alive. I want one of the two, but only you can help me in this on. When you click the link that I’ll provide, I’d appreciate it tremendously if you go to the Funniest Blogger category and scroll down the category, and click on The Phil Factor. Click HERE to vote!

Thank you for your support! ~Phil

Blogger Award Nominations Close Tomorrow: Do I Get A Nomination?

Do I get a nomination for Funniest Blogger? Well, that’s up to you. I can’t nominate myself. The Annual Bloggers Bash Award Nominations are now open! Click HERE to find out how you can nominate me for Funniest Blogger and others for all the other great blogger categories.

Why should you nominate me for Funniest Blogger? In addition to this list of hilarious posts I published last week, I present to you the funniest top ten lists from #ThePhilFactor:

Ten Blogging Pet Peeves

Ten Reasons I won’t Date Taylor Swift

Ten Signs Your Wife is Cheating with an Amish Guy

Top Ten Perks of Being The Pope

Top Ten Reasons I’m Not Spiderman

Ten Situations That Should Be Solved By a Rap Battle

Ten Sexy Quotes From Yelp Restaurant Reviews

If you like my blog and have a minute or two, click HERE to go to the page where you can nominate me for Funniest Blogger. The nominating window closes at midnight tomorrow. If you do, thank you so much. I really appreciate your support. Have a great evening! ~Phil

Blogger Award Nominations Are Open! Nominate me!

The Annual Bloggers Bash Award Nominations are now open! Click HERE to find out how you can nominate me for Funniest Blogger and others for all the other great blogger categories.

Why should you nominate me for Funniest Blogger? Here, I would like to present to you exhibits to support my case:

1. The Poop at Home People

2. Do Drugs, Not Hugs

3. The Casino Walking Dead

4. The Afterlife To Do List

5. Me and Billie Joe Armstrong

6. The Top Ten Reasons I Won’t Date Taylor Swift

7. Top Ten Blogging Pet Peeves

8. When You Want To Kill Them Just For Chewing

Those are just a sampling of my over 1,700 blog posts. Feel free to scroll back and read them all, or click this Best Of… tab. If after reading some of my work you believe I am one of, if not the funniest blogger you’ve ever read, then I would definitely appreciate a nomination, just click HERE

Thank you for your support, and have a great Wednesday! ~Phil